BLOGGER TEMPLATES AND TWITTER BACKGROUNDS

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

It all ends with joy

Extra added bonus! This post has been fitted with convenient headings so you can choose which bits interest you!
1. Musings on blogging.

Why have a blog? Attention? Loneliness? Wanting to make friends? To connect with people and express myself? To make my goals more real and myself accountable? To celebrate life with like-minded others?
Are you a bit obsessive about your comments? I'm so lame, I sometimes even get a bit huffy and hurt when I don’t get ‘enough’
Neurotic LBTEPA:(whines) why don't they liiiiike me?
Stable LBTEPA: (sarcastically) of course, I forgot, no-one has anything else to do but comment on your blog, which is the centre of the Universe!
*slaps self on head, tells self to Get A Grip*
All utterly adolescent of course, and even more so when I realise it’s actually that ‘people will reject me if I’m not nice/good/ positive and if I’m rejected I will DIE’ thought pattern talking. I have struggled with this stupid reaction most of my life, but at least I recognise and challenge it now. Ah, maturity, eh? The other bloggy struggle I have is how much to disclose. Various life experiences have taught me that it’s dangerous to let people know when you’re feeling vulnerable, but then that leads to a bullet-proof façade which provokes either admiration or hostility - never support - along with trying to cope with everything alone, isolation and depression. I’ve been down that track, girls and boys – it’s not a good way.
It’s always a fire walk, isn’t it? Online as well as in the non-virtual world. You have to reach out to connect with people, but reaching out is scary 'cause you might not encounter kindness. I actually think it’s less of a risk in the blog-sphere, because people who blog have chosen to reach out and are more likely to be honest and supportive because that’s what they want for themselves.
Do you ever wish you didn’t think so much? I want to find the self-doubt switch, turn it off and RIP that bastard out of the wall. I think the answer is to work out the purpose of my blog. Getting that clear in my mind will help me feel more at ease about what I’m writing. For some reason I’m feeling a bit uncomfortable and scratchy in my skin lately, so anything that makes life more peaceful will be a blessing. Or maybe I should just HTFU* and write.
2.Training.
Even without running and with no specific event goals (for moi, tres weird) this has been a good training week. In my mind I’ve committed to doing that 4km swim in December (will have to check the Spousal Unit’s roster and my training progress before I hand over the cash) so I’m seeing all my lunchtime laps as money in the bank. I am utterly in love with riding my bike so every outing is a treat, especially since I think I have finally nutted out the right seat position.
3. Joy.
Did I tell you I’ve switched my car radio to the classical station? I spend about 6 hours a week driving and it occurred to me not long ago that I HATE COMMERCIAL RADIO – annoying announcers, stupid ads, unpleasant doof-doof music. I’ve no idea why it took me so long to think of doing something so simple that punctuates my day with beauty. Since then, I’ve been looking for other unconsidered habits that I might change to put more joy in my life. I need more fresh flowers, more bike rides, more bright colours, more singing. What about your life? What can you change to give yourself more joy?

Coming Soon - end of October wrap-up! Ooooh I bet you can't wait......
More anon, philosophers.*Harden The F#$% Up - a very popular acronym on the very scary hardcore triathlon forum in which I occasionally lurk.

62 much-appreciated comments:

Celeste said...

Yes, you definitely think too much! And as I glance down at my desk calendar I am struck by a suitably profound quote from Mahatma Gandhi - "The difference between what we do and what we are capable of doing would suffice to solve most of the world's problems." Nothing at all to do with what you were talking about.... but at least it's philosophical.

kathrynoh said...

I want one of those off switches too.

Commercial radio is so awful, I'd shoot myself if I had to listen to it. All that fake perkiness.

MorseyRuns said...

I sing and dance in the car to a Fergie CD - yep, I am Glamorous every time I get in the car!
So when is our 4km swim?? And where?

Wes said...

We all like our pals to come by and comment! Don't we? LOL...

That 4K swim sounds exciting! There's a 5K swim at the same place I did the Hiawassee tri. I think I'm going to give that a try this year.

david santos said...

Hello, Lbtepa!
Thanks for posting, very good.
have a good day

Dante said...

Commercial radio...every morning I drive in waiting for a good song, then waiting for just any song rather than ads and endless chatter...not sure why I haven't switched, I usually turn off.

As for what to blog, I'm tending now to reduce mine to training only...in terms of what to disclose, I find it hard to reveal anything deep at all. I was criticized when my mum died in terms of basically shutting up shop, which led to the same experience as you, zero support. Not something I can change easily though, I haven't had any luck as yet.

There you go, as deep as you will likely get from me on the net!

GeekGirl said...

1. I'm fully of self doubt all the time. Pirate usually talks me down. I suck, I'm ugly, etc.

2. I stopped listening to commercial radio when I figured out I could burn/rip my own music. Joy!! Of course, nothing I listen to is as classy as what you're listening to. It's mostly pop and techno crap. But I like it; it makes me happy, and that's the point!

Duane said...

Yes, I wish I could turn my brain off! And yes, we love you!

Brooke said...

When you find that self-doubt switch, could you turn mine off too please? :)

xoxo

S. Baboo said...

Ha, I've sulked gloomily thinking I didn't get enough comments of a particularly excellent post. I have learned to shut off my thinking...the problem now is figuring out how to turn it back on!

Miss Beck said...

After years of blogging I have learnt a few things...

Only approxiamately 5% of my readers ever comment. Ever.

If it is a particularly opinionated post, people don't comment as much.

If it is a self doubting post or negative post, they come out of the wood work.

If you have acheived something, they come out of the woodwork.

If the weather is good, they disappear again.

Seriously, there is no rhyme or reason. I'm over the amount of comments simply because I love the quality of comments (suc as your advice)....

To me, quality outranks quantity any day.

Benson said...

No, I'm not commenting here. Really, I hate commenting on peoples posts. I never comment cuz it's dumb. Leaving a comment implies that I acually read your post about self doubt, which we all have, and acually relate to what you said about commercial radio, which we all also dislike.
Have a great swim.
Love you to bits.
Mmmmuah.

Lisa - Slow & Steady said...

I'm with you on disliking commercial radio. I have a 6 CD changer in my car so I get to listen to music of my choosing and it definately affects my mood. Recently I've started taking headphone to the gym also to block out their music and listen to my own. And apparently I decided that running skirts would give me joy (and guess what...they DO!). :)

IHateToast said...

what about joy fm?

i dig podcasts. or internet radio. no djs!

also get uc berkeley history classes on my iTunes. how nerdy.

Anonymous said...

buy diazepam buy diazepam online cheap - para que sirve la diazepam 10 mg

Anonymous said...

buy zolpidem tartrate zolpidem 10mg northstar - negative side effects of zolpidem

Anonymous said...

xanax online xanax pills pictures - risperidone xanax drug interactions

Anonymous said...

diazepam 10mg diazepam 5mg safe - buy diazepam valium usa

Anonymous said...

xanax cheap xanax 80 mg - 20mg hydrocodone and 1 mg xanax

Anonymous said...

buy valium online valium dosage for adults - what is valium 5mg for

Anonymous said...

diazepam online diazepam valium drug class - diazepam valium for cats

Anonymous said...

alprazolam online xanax withdrawal 5 days - xanax drug test one time use

Anonymous said...

buy valium online valium 5 mg tablets - valium 2 5 mg

Anonymous said...

cheap ativan online lorazepam ativan and alcohol - illegal buy lorazepam online

Anonymous said...

online xanax buy generic xanax online no prescription - happens u overdose xanax

Anonymous said...

buy diazepam online diazepam 5mg high - legal buy diazepam usa

Anonymous said...

ativan price ativan withdrawal dreams - buy generic lorazepam online

Anonymous said...

cheap ativan ativan medicine - ativan 2.5mg side effects

Anonymous said...

buy diazepam diazepam online ohne rezept - diazepam 2 mg withdrawal

Anonymous said...

buy ativan ativan withdrawal seizures - ativan buzz

Anonymous said...

order ambien without prescriptions generic ambien dosage - medication stronger than ambien

Anonymous said...

zolpidem without prescription buy vicodin and ambien online - ambien withdrawal klonopin

Anonymous said...

buy soma best place buy soma - carisoprodol typical dosage

Anonymous said...

buy generic valium online no prescription how much does valium cost without insurance - valium 10mg et alcool

Anonymous said...

buy diazepam buy valium medication - valium 5mg alcool

Anonymous said...

online pharmacy for valium dosage valium goutte - will 10mg valium do me

Anonymous said...

soma carisoprodol carisoprodol side effects - soma medication info

Anonymous said...

l9g0aod7 http://www.isotretinoin4health.net/#generic-isotretinoin - accutane for sale accutane no prescription

Anonymous said...

buy soma carisoprodol dosage for back pain - generic for soma 250

Anonymous said...

l9g0aod7 http://www.isotretinoin4health.net/#isotretinoin-cost - accutane online accutane pills

Anonymous said...

c4ks84bd http://www.cheapisotretinoinforless.net/#cheap-accutane - cheap accutane cheap accutane no prescription

Anonymous said...

xn7bl2d5 http://www.cheapisotretinoinforless.net/#buying-accutane-online - isotretinoin online isotretinoin online pharmacy

Anonymous said...

c4ks84bd http://www.cheapisotretinoinforless.net/#buying-isotretinoin-online - buying isotretinoin online cheap accutane

Anonymous said...

xn7bl2d5 http://www.cheapisotretinoinforless.net/#isotretinoin-pills - buy accutane no prescription buy accutane online

Anonymous said...

r0n6ks8f http://www.fatfreemind.com/#order-phentermine-online-no-prescription - order phentermine online no prescription phentermine 37.5

Anonymous said...

not9js6f http://www.thepromise1073.com/#finasteride-5mg - finasteride 5mg finasteride cost

Anonymous said...

not9js6f http://www.thepromise1073.com/#generic-propecia-online - generic propecia online order finasteride

Anonymous said...

dsc4hd7h http://www.jonathanornstein.com/#order-lexapro-online - order lexapro online purchase lexapro

Anonymous said...

asrg7hr http://therebelsocietyonline.com/#generic-ambien-cost - ambien 10mg ambien cost

Anonymous said...

ACTOS helps control blood sugar levels in your body by reducing insulin resistance—a condition in which your body’s cells don’t respond to a hormone (called insulin) that allows them to turn blood sugar into energy. http://www.diabetichelpmeds.com/ - avandia diabetes No prescription! Fast delivery! It is used for treating patients with type 2 diabetes and is in a class of anti-diabetic drugs called thiazolidinediones. When this happens, sugar (glucose) builds up in the blood.

Anonymous said...

It works by blocking the COX-2 enzyme. A dosage of 24mg for example renders patients free of pain within 24 hours of taking the drug. [url=http://www.oakleycheapsunglass.com/]celebrex pills[/url] It works by blocking the COX-2 enzyme. Celebrex is a fast-acting drug, providing relief within 60 minutes of taking it.

Anonymous said...

No prescription! Fast delivery! http://www.diabetichelpmeds.com/ - avandia medication ACTOS is a once-daily oral prescription medication that, with diet and exercise, has been shown to be effective for the treatment of type 2 diabetes. Avandia(Rosiglitazone) is an oral drug that reduces the amount of sugar (glucose) in the blood. ACTOS is a once-daily oral prescription medication that, with diet and exercise, has been shown to be effective for the treatment of type 2 diabetes.

Anonymous said...

Strattera online sales. [url=http://www.kokopelliinnspa.com/]strattera sale[/url] It does need to build up in the system for it to be as effective as possible. Strattera online sales.

Anonymous said...

Because of the nature of the drug, Nolvadex may reduce the bodyпїЅs ability to heal bruises and injuries as rapidly as before. http://www.uegmusic.com/ - tamoxifen without prescription generic Nolvadex Women who have a high cancer risk may also take Nolvadex to reduce their risk factor.

Anonymous said...

The treatment of insomnia with Ambien has been very successful and preliminary indications show that it will also continue to be very beneficial in the treatment of brain damage. [url=http://www.jobhunting2011.org/]order ambien online no prescription[/url] Ambien is also commonly prescribed to those who are in a coma, even if they have been in a coma for years as it has been found to take patients from being comatose to becoming more response and even begin talking within a short period of time. Ambien is unique because it doesnпїЅt work the way most of the sleep aides on the market work. It has been prescribed for millions of people all around the world.

Anonymous said...

t6m2m6k7 http://www.bullterrierproblems.com/#prednisone-online - prednisone online prednisone online pharmacy

Anonymous said...

There are some side effects associated with Propecia which include decreased sexual desire and/or ability and a decrease in the amount of semen released during sex. It is possible to experience an allergic reaction when taking Propecia so if you have a rash, severe dizziness or trouble breathing, seek medical attention immediately. [url=http://www.worldlysoles.com/]generic propecia 5mg[/url] Propecia without prescription There are some side effects associated with Propecia which include decreased sexual desire and/or ability and a decrease in the amount of semen released during sex.

Anonymous said...

Propecia no prescription It wasnпїЅt until 1997 that the U. http://www.utilsinbatcountry.com/ - order propecia online The men who did not take the medication at all continued to see hair loss. Unfortunately, when you cease taking the medication you begin to experience hair loss again within six to 12 months so the treatment needs to be ongoing to maintain the new growth.

Anonymous said...

Imitrex is generally very well tolerated, but for those who cannot seem to shake the side effects, they will need to discuss other options with their doctor to determine the best course of action. Imitrex without prescription http://www.streamsly.com/ - imitrex without prescription It may have also cause a variety of heart issues including coronary artery vasospasm, transient myocardial ischemia, ventricular fibrillation, myocardial infarction, and ventricular tachycardia. A sulfa based drug that is used in the treatment of migraine headaches, Imitrex is only available with a prescription.

Anonymous said...

Some patients using Lamisil have developed serious liver damage which has led them to needing liver transplants. http://www.heritageloftsofchamblee.com/ - buy terbinafine Purchase Lamisil. In most cases reported regarding liver damage the patient has had a pre-existing liver problem prior to using Lamisil. It is essential to tell your doctor if you have symptoms of liver disease such as an upset stomach, nausea, pain, loss of appetite, dark urine or jaundice.

Anonymous said...

l3m7n8s63h http://www.prozacforcheap.net/#buy-prozac - buy prozac prozac online

Anonymous said...

l3m7n8s63h http://www.bestpriceprednisone.net/#cheap-generic-prednisone - cheap generic prednisone cheapest prednisone