Happiness is when your kid lets you sleep past 6.30 on Christmas day

MERRY CHRISTMAS :)

Breathing in, breathing out

This has been a big two weeks - Noddie's dance concert  week (final classes, photo shoot, stop-start and dress rehearsals and two performances) was followed in tragically rapid succession by the passing away of the Spousal Unit's mother in the early hours of Monday morning. It was very peaceful and gentle, the best way you could ask for I suppose.Since then there has been the organisation of two services 350km apart; one for the family at the country cemetery where my mother-in-law wanted to be interred, and one back here. We're full up the wazoo with restaurant food, church-lady pointy sandwiches and slice and I never want to hear K.D. Lang's 'hallelujia' ever again. Thank goodness I am uber-prepared for Christmas and have an admin assistant I could ring up at 7am on Monday to ring all my clients and cancel their appointments (thanks Mum!). J is still in shock, his dad is shattered and Noddie is so sad it's just heartbreaking. I've been shoving whatever's at hand into my mouth just to keep moving and there has been no exercise whatsoever. I'm not weighing myself for at least a week, and after I finish this I'm not getting off the couch for several days.
I did attend my physio appointment this week and in a much-needed ray of sunshine, we think we have identified The Problem at last. Apparently when most people activate their abs, both their upper and lower abs join in. Not mine, it seems. They just sit peering about vaguely, saying 'huh?' when requested to do their bit. Well, not any more. The lazy little bastards are about to get the shock of their lives when I pummel them with the new exercises the physio gave me. Bwahahaha! And I'm allowed to swim again - not freestyle yet, just breaststroke and backstroke but I'm not whingeing no no no noooo. Also allowed to cycle again as often and as far as I like.
Edit: I have just been to the pool; I got tired alarmingly early but it was lovely anyway.
More anon, plodders-on

best words ever spoken

"It always seems impossible until it's done." - Nelson Mandela

11/12/13

had to head this with the date bc it's so fun to write!... and there isn't much else going on. Operation 'completely rebuild my gait so my knees track properly' grinds its interminable way on. I'm almost numb to thoughts of one day being able to do something fun like swimming or running. One day I will get fit again. I will. I just have to keep doing the stupid boring upsetting painful exercises important basic stuff now, over and over and over, whether or not it makes me sad becuase it's so obvious how very very far I have to go. That will get me there.Still, summer is here and so is Christmas, my tree is up, the house is full of tinsel, the cards have been posted and it's Noddie's dance concert on the weekend which has become good fun now I'm not so terrified of the backstage mums.

more anon, tinselators!

No no no

abs didn't activate - I made them activate
glutes didn't activate - I'm making them activate
no walking, no swimming - I don't walk or swim
nearly drown in anger and shame and sadness - I work out how to reframe it and be ok
went to the gym the other night and was all excited becuase I got to do some cool stuff on the bosu ball, which was hard and required concentrating like a mofo. I had fun. I felt good! (not happening so much lately so I hung onto it all day).
went to the physio today - glutes still not activating, and my knees turn in! I knew that, but I thought it was just how they were - apparently it's functional, not structural. I have to undo 45 years of wonky-kneed bipedalling. Somehow.
no swimming
no elliptical
no bosu ball

short rides only
as for running hahahahahahahahahahaha

[swear word]