Bad mother

I wouldn't know, of course, but I expect a good mother probably enjoys being with her screaming arguing crying child and lots of good mothers with flattering haircuts and seventeen of their screaming arguing crying (but nowhere near as awful) children at a 5th birthday party with no grown-up food (or drink) at her friend's large spotless house. A good mother's house is never such a squalid hovel that the only solution after coming home from her friends' large spotless house is to burn said hovel - and the mulcher in the living room (I kid you not) - to the ground. While being screamed at and kicked attempting to remove a prickle from her child's foot, she never COMPLETELY loses her temper and smacks said child really hard, then spends the rest of the day hating herself. She's written her Christmas letter, done her tax for the last two years and does not gaze with longing at the chardy at 3pm, wishing it was 5.59. Nor is her solitary ray of happiness (apart from a morning swim) the beautiful effectiveness of her new bagless vacuum cleaner. She can think of something other than pizza for dinner, and no doubt sleeps well too. As I said, I wouldn't know.
Today is a new day THANK YOU GOD. Baked-bean jaffles and tea are my friends. After Sunday school we'll have a practice on the birthday bike and paint Noddie's new bed, then Daddy will come home from work and we'll put up the Christmas tree. Or maybe they can put up the tree and I'll go for a ride...or do the tax...or write the Christmas letter....
More anon, temporary teetotallers.

It didn't rain

Race report: Gatorade 1 St Kilda
Distance: 2km run (subbed for swim)/20km/5km
Time: 1.45.39
Rating: Happy
I started writing a longish race report about how this was all so slapdash and underprepared compared with last year but still fun etc etc but it was sooo very boring I nearly nodded off. Here is the short version. No need to thank me, I'm here to help.
Night before: lots of rain and wind and oh crap it’s 8am, my wave starts at 8.10 and I’m still at home dreams.
Race day: windy, my word it was windy. But not raining. Phew. Warmer than expected; bag of extra clothes unnecessary (although a warm jersey on the bike made this cold la-la feel good). Panic! Friends who picked up my race packet lost it! Thankyou organisers for making all well. Phew again. Run/ride/run: so not my forte – after 500 m I was 100m behind the pack with all my mates, ahem. Sigh.
T1 – almost forgot to put my bike shoes on!
Riding into that #$%&!!$! wind made me grateful for every single winter ride I did and every single gear Minerva possesses, and that’s enough about that (except for the gusts blowing me sideways – however did the skinnyfasts stay on?). Mantra: stupid song turn ‘em over turn ‘em over turn ‘em o-o-ver. You're glad you weren’t there, trust me.
T2: another record for slowness, how do I do it?
Run: oh my, doesn’t that old familiar lead-legged stumble take you back? Still, there was the fearsome headwind as a distraction. So nice looking forward to the turnaround. Mantra: stupid song pick ‘em up, pick em up turn ‘em o-o-ver…don’t knock it, it worked for me.
Huge thing: I ran all the way without stopping. Very proud of that *beams*.
The last km I took everything I learned at the Gold Coast half and ran as hard as I could, harder than I thought I could, my legs were hurting and I was gasping but I wasn’t going to die and I wasn’t going to stop either. This is new for me. It’s kind of fun in a strange way. Finishing a la Wes is so fun too – put your hands in the air like you just don’t care and give that chute what for!
Nutrition Plan all hail the mighty nutrition plan: Nailed It.*
Bling: yep. 2nd place Athena

Tip for beginners: noting the name of street where you parked avoids riding about aimlessly wondering whether your car has been stolen.
After lunch we took Noddie to the park to practice on her new bike. Sprints anyone? Oh my poor legs....

More anon, sleepyheads
*Nutrition Plan: Pre race- banana and cuppa. Liquid breakfast an hour prior. Gel at start. Bike: full bottle of endura. Run: gel at first water station. Gatorade afterward. KFC for luch. What?

Weather report

Mum took Dad home yesterday to continue his recovery. Such a relief for them.
I was lucky enough to bump into a fellow blogger who works at the hospital - thanks for your kind words Linda, it was so nice to see you *mwah*

Now, if I may, I draw your attention to this:
Melbourne Current Conditions

• Current temp: 11.2°C
• Recorded min: 8°C
• Recorded max: 15°C
• Feels like: 9.0°C

• Humidity: 74%
• Rainfall since 9am: 7.0mm
• Wind: SSW 59km/h
• Wind gusts: 85km/h

Sunday - Rain
Min: 11°C Max: 17°C

For my non-celsius readers, that's stupidly f#$%ing cold and windy and bloody wet. Just BTW: hello? did anyone realise this is November? and SUMMER starts in 8 days? Sheesh.
I was just sitting in the living room watching hailstones the size of peas smash against the window, and I was secretly very glad that tomorrow's triathlon season-opener has had the swim cancelled. I'd have been ok, because I am LBTEPA who Fears Not The Waves hahahaha, but riding and running in the wet and cold is so much more pleasant if you don't start off soaked and freezing, don't you think?*
And I get to race - did I mention that? I GET TO RACE!!

More anon, stalwarts!
* How do you like my (utterly false) insouciance? Convincing?

Once upon a time....

....there was a princess called Noddie. It was her birthday. She was FIVE!!
After that, lots and lots (maybe even twenty!) aunts and uncles and Mummy and Daddy's friends came over and everyone had a good time. The End.

More anon, party people!

Phew

My parents live about 300km from Melbourne. Last night the phone rang at 10.20pm. It was my Mum, saying my Dad had been airlifted to the Alfred Hospital and was in the trauma centre with a fractured skull and bleeding on the brain after being struck by the boom of another yacht during a race yesterday. Mum had to organise some things and wouldn't be coming down until today. I went to the hospital straight away, arriving at about 11pm. My sister C came in at about 1am and we sat with Dad until morning, holding his hand and talking to him. Even though he was unconscious most of the time, drifting in and out, we just wanted someone he knew to be there. When he finally did awake, he was very disoriented but could recognise us and move all his limbs, which the nurses and registrars told us was a good sign. C went home to her place to meet Mum and bring her into the hospital. I stayed with Dad, who was getting more responsive and restless. After a while my brothers arrived, and then Mum and C. The neurologist told us that the bleeding and swelling were minor and that Dad would require a lot of rest to allow the fractures to heal. No surgery. Very strong likelihood of a full recovery. Phew.

I got home at 2pm and had a short nap before Noddie's kinder concert. Now we are preparing for her (somewhat pared-down) birthday party tomorrow. We've got to stop inviting everyone we know to these things. I'm feeling a bit shaken and very tired, but so very thankful.

The reason why*

Can I be blunt? This winter was a bit of a pain.
I was sick. I ran sick. I got sick in Queensland. I got sick at my old job. I started my new, terrific, stressful job and got sick again. Noddie went to kinder and got sick and the Spousal Unit went to work and got sick and I got sick again.
I found out you can train like it was your job and run your heart out but sometimes it’s just not your day. I found out you can’t outrun or outride severe bronchitis. I found out (again) that some things cannot be toughed out. I found out I’ve been paying a lot of money to wear shoes made for lapsed-arched pronators when I’m a high-arched supinator. I found out that I had severely underestimated my quite astonishing capacity for self-pity and whining.
I didn’t do anything I wanted to. I didn’t run a full marathon or the Melbourne half. I didn't set a PB at the Gold Coast. I didn’t ride the Bay in a Day. I didn’t give up drinking. I didn’t lose lots of weight. I didn’t train consistently. I didn’t bravely rise above it all and set a good example to inspire others.
I whinged. I bitched. I grizzled and moaned and carried on and cried and wallowed. I got fed up. I threw my hands up. I arked up. I jacked up, I gave up. And then I got up.
I learned stuff this winter. I learned to run hard. I learned to suck it up and cheer for others doing what I wished I was doing. I learned about disappointment, and I learned about friendship.
I ran 6km non-stop today. I got an interview for the very competitive Masters in Clinical Psych that I really want to do next year. It's Noddie's birthday on Tuesday, and let me assure you that her Princess party will be spoken of with awe down the ages.
And you know what? Next weekend, I GET TO RACE.

I GET TO RACE.

More anon, blissful grinners
*The wonderful Lisa wrote a very thought-provoking post on this recently. Thgnks for the insight my friend

Spelling

Can I send a big *raspberry* to people who don’t get hayfever? I hate you all.
Really over ‘ladyproblems’ and the way they f#$% with my moods.
Also Noddie isn’t sleeping well = I’m up three times a night. Sigh.
Not drinking or eating too much though, hurrah.
Kindness is the key – to others and myself. Work, love, exercise, laugh! And not whinge
You all have a lovely weekend *blows kiss to the world*more anon, mood elevators!

Whingeing my way to success

I was just looking at the distance tallies in my sidebar

Jul - Swim none Bike 80KM Run 29km stupid #$%$!!*&! bronchitis
Aug - S4800m B358KM R 35KM clearly still thought I might be able to manage the Bay Ride hahahahaha
Sep - S4400m B103KM R22KM
Oct - S10000m B 161KM R 55KM
Nov (to date) - S3000m B48km R 19km
More anon, pluggers-away!

how to have a good weekend

Saturday morning
- drink tea, eat toast, feed Noddie toast
- do washing, empty dishwasher, clean kitchen etc
- go for a run. Feel as though balance and endurance might slowly slowly be returning
- watch Noddie have fun at her swimming lesson. Feel happy because last week she refused to get in and was never going back again.

- have a splendid time at the Whittlesea show. Eat a melt-in-your-mouth steak sandwich, admire yet be faintly worried by the ingenuity of local children yes it is made of what you think it is and buy the completely unnecessary yet fabulous pink coat I have lusted after for the last three years

- share the Last Ever Bottle of our favourite tipple they've stopped making it! Oh woe, oh woe and alas! with the neighbours.
- refrain from fighting with exhausted feral child (my own), good thing I've been studying non-violent communication I can tell you
- eat pizza
- watch 10 seconds of tv
- zzzzzz
Sunday morning
- drink tea, eat porridge with apricots, feed Noddie toast
- rush out for a bike ride before the wind came up
- take Noddie to church for Sunday school
- accidentally reveal inability to believe in the resurrection of the body (no wonder the angels hid my book)
- see - in real time, thanks lronman Iive! - my friend Wes fulfill his dream of finishing Ironman! Huge congratulations to you Wes!
- drive to Brighton to swim at the sea baths as a bit of a hit-out before a couple of events I have coming up
- wish I had a long-sleeved wetsuit
- remember how very very much I love swimming in the sea, even when it's cccccold
- fly our new kite and make sandcastles with Noddie and J- eat fish and chips by the beach in the car in the pouring rain and before you say anything, it is superfluous chips that I am avoiding. F&c chips don't count.
- refrain from fighting with exhausted feral child, good thing I've been studying non-violent communication I can tell you
- watch 10 seconds of rugby
zzzzzzzzzzzzz
Tomorrow will be very strange indeed - I haven't worked on Cup Day since I was at uni and my exams were in the second week of November. Double time will just about make up for it though, mwahahaha. Go Moatise!

I love my new hat

More anon, millinery fanciers!