Enough about THAT

LBTEPA's five faithful readers will be pleased to learn that she has officially Let It Go. Mind you if I see that old besom when I'm out and there's a handy semi roaring by it could well be a different story. People shouldn't be gratuitously nasty, but I have gained 15 kg which does put me into the fat category, no denying it. These things happen. So if people see 'fat', that's accurate. If they see 'fabulous and beautifully dressed' or 'brave and determined' as well, then they're paying proper attention and good for them. And if they don't, f*** 'em.

Oh my friends, so many cool things have happened since last I posted! now that I am allowed up and down ladders again (yayyayyay!) the last outpost of soul-sucking donkey beige has finally been banished from my house.

Noddie went to Book Week as Cleopatra, becuase I reckon the window of opportunity to muck around with crushed velvet and rickrack is closing fast so I'm going to make the most of it

My physio has told me that it's over between us!! WOOT!!! Yes, I have been sent out alone into the cold cold snow (as it were), aka I'm better enough to be let loose without supervision. WOOTWOOTWOOT!!! Of course I must be patient and cautious blahblahblah but I can pretty much do what I want now, which means no more deep water running ever ever EVER.
I'm either swimming, riding or running five or six times a week - I feel almost like a real athlete again! Such A Great Feeling. My current favourite quote:

'training is like fighting a gorilla. You don't stop when YOU"RE tired. You stop when the GORILLA is tired'

Since I've been 'signed off' medically I've been able to walk Noddie to school again, which is not only a really nice mum-kid time but another 8-10km a week on the legs.  My fave 'new' motivational strategy is probably so blindingly obvious that you clever chaps out in the interwebs do it without even thinking about it, but I will share it anyway: put the gear on early! If I plan to go swimming after I walk Noddie to school, then I'll wear my togs and some fleecies for the walk. If I plan to run before lunch on Sunday, then as soon as I get home from church I'll strap myself into the sports bra. It's mildly embarrassing to change out of exercise clothes when you haven't actually exercised. Every bit of incentive helps, don't you think? Mind you a master procrastinator could find herself at 2.30 in the afternoon still in her togs and fleecies with barely enough time for a swim before the afternoon school run. I admit nothing.
What quotes inspire you? And what 'tricks' do you use to get out the door to exercise?
More anon, empresses!

....and a lovely day to you too, b****

I was out running this morning - more on the general state of awesomeness of things in another post; suffice it to say I've had a lot of extra washing of exercise clothes to do lately  - and had stopped to stretch my calf when an old lady in a motorised wheelchair thingy trundled up
Doing that'll cost you a lot of money she said
Pardon? quoth I (all I could think of, in my innocence, was this top comes from Kmart - but little did I know...)
Well you've obviously spent a lot of money putting on all that weight and now you're going to waste it
*brief pause whilst images of her being trampled beneath a ravening mongol horde flit through the dumbfounded LBTEPA noggin*
You're very rude. Go away.
Well good luck to you anyway dear
*sound of teeth grinding as only LBTEPA's superb upbringing prevents her from pushing the old harpy under a passing ute*

 I've spent the day catching sight of myself in windows and wondering is that what people see? I feel a bit unsettled. It'll wear off, I'm sure, but I was just so gobsmacked at her thoughtless nastiness.
Bitch.
I'm going to the pool tomorrow in my fierce new black togs. Anyone of normal eyesight and judgemental mind can SUFFER.
Roooaaarrrrr!!!!!

More anon, khans!

things that make you go hmmmm

....struggling with this a little bit at the moment...
but staying patient and working hard, for that is the LBTEPA way. Run 1 minute, walk 1 minute. 30 minutes, twice a week. Pool, bike, weights. Little and often is how I will get strong again.
I had this fab plan that from now on I am going to get up early and work out becuase trying to summon the oomph for a bit of righteous sweating at 8.30pm is more than I am up for at the 'mo. So last night I slept horribly badly, but I went out for a (ahem) 'run' this morning did you see that? "for a run" all casual-like as though that was some normal thing wow anyway because I decided that fresh-aired and exercised and tired and crabby was better than just tired and crabby. While I was out I met the old bloke I always used to high-five back in the good old days. We were very pleased to see each other.
After this morning I would also like to thank the town planning gods for making it almost compulsory to plant plum trees as street trees. Avant gardeners (hahaha I am so funny) like my Mum think they are ever so passe, but they call to me happily that winter is over. Spring is coming!

 More anon, blossoms!

One day

I kept it all on the straight and narrow for 11 days. Walking, swimming, running (squee! running!!), cycling after dark with my flashing light clipped to my shorts - flashing my bum just doesn't sound right, does it? - becuase the day's crazy left 8.30-9.00 as the only free time...it all happened for eleven days straight becuase I made it happen. And it was good. Then yesterday I took Team LBTEPA out for dinner to celebrate the new business - which I absolutely could not run without them - hitting an amazing financial milestone astonishingly quickly, and the exercise didn't happen.

Today, my five faithful readers, it will. I'll help Noddie with her piano practice and fold the washing and finish my case notes and THEN I WILL WALK.
Eleven schmeleven I say
rrrrROOOAAARRRR!!!!!

More anon, Pleistocenes!
*EDIT: I DID IT. Case notes went unfinished and the washing is still blocking the laundry door in a big tiresome pile, but I went out and walked. Let the next streak commence

well there's not much happening here Bruce (2013 edition)

Well there’s not much happening here, Bruce, the crowd is getting a bit restless….but hang on – what’s that?
Look Tim – a sight we didn’t think we’d see for quite some time – a heartwarming sight – a sight built on determination and courage....
Please stop talking such bullshit Bruce - now listeners, from the broadcast box here we can just see through the tunnel leading into the stadium – the crowd have just got the feed on the big screen and they’re rising to their feet screaming in delight as a small figure...
What? What? Who is it? What’s she doing?
...a small figure, dwarfed by this mighty stadium, the site of so many dreams and triumphs…..
if you don’t tell me right now Tim I will biff you one
...she’s lifting her knees
...her shoulders are back and her head is held high
...she’s breathing easily and grinning from ear to ear, oh this is an emotional moment Tim
here’s a hanky for you Bruce now get on with it

...it’s LBTEPA

....and she’s RUNNING!!!

oh this is a great day Bruce, such a happy day, a day we thought might never come.... give me that hanky


and the crowd goes wild!!!!!


More anon, invincibles!