B2B

Back to basics it is! I have a chart!

The chart idea arose from my insistence that Noddie practice her dance and instruments over the summer holidays, and us using the charts so she could manage her time herself, 'cause I'm lazy. I then realised that I had better walk my talk, dammit, so I made myself one too. The 'can't let her get ahead of me' motivation has been quite compelling.
It was all thrown out the window while we were on holidays on The Ghan.It was like being in a movie - unbelievably privileged and flash.  If you get a chance to go do! It's such an experience, and the scenery as you traverse the nation from top to bottom (hard to even conceive!) is ever-changing and amazing. Not to mention the food!

This was the first course of breakfast! So naturally I came home with a little bit more extra lard, and then we had a couple of bits of bad news which I dealt with by eating and drinking, and then ....I started logging my eating. I have been absolutely staggered by the amount of little stuff I shove in my gob when I'm not thinking! LOts and lots of little stuff = not-so-little LBTEPA. Standing back and identifying what I'm actually feeling when I am about to stuff said gob has been enlightening too - it's pretty much always 'I can't manage this, it's too much, no-one will help me'. Sadness and fear, those old faves. I have to keep reminding myself that these worrying times will pass, that the Spousal Unit is better now, that now is not then when it was all going down and I really did have to keep the family afloat all by myself. All is well, I can tell myself. All is well. Step away from the pantry.
I must tell you , my five faithful readers, about the book I've been reading - a towering work of staggering genius which has changed my life! Not, I hasten to assure you, the latest Haruki Murakami, which irritated me no end, but The Terrible and Wonderful Reasons Why I Run Long Distances, by the genius cartoonist of The Oatmeal. His slim volume is absolutely chockers with wisdom, and wit, yet it was one small paragraph quite near the end which resonated like a temple bell next to a hangover. 30 minutes, the writer states forcefully, is just a little bit more than 2% of your day. If you're not willing to hang in there for 2% of your day to feel better, then you don't deserve to feel better! Ooh, I said to myself, he has a point there. And nearly every time I think that, out the door I go. So it's starting to come together, a little bit. Now I have to go and change my bike tyre. I'll let you know how it goes!
More anon, carolers!

much better

well, that was awkward
good thing I got rid of that horrible cesspit of whining
- yes, what's still here is the 'un-whiny' bit - ack!
So how are you all? Kicking goals from what I can see of the book of face. Brilliant!
and so inspiring
I too have been kicking goals
not Peter Daicos left footed wrong-sided how-did-he-do-that? sneakers, but goals nonetheless. Little easy set shots. Walking 3 times a week. Want 4, working on it.
Weights, core, physio 3 times a week. Ditto.
I've even been out on my bike, coo er gosh
yes that's how far down I'd got, don't judge, even two bike rides are a cause for celebration here
often a bit sore and achy
so many niggles, so many internal freakouts!
but that's how it it
A turning point was when I consciously engaged with the thought that avoiding feeling weak/slow/fat was interfering with my expressing my values of health and fitness
HELLO CAPTAIN OBVIOUS!!!
had to find my own way there, though. I'm an experiential learner, me
I make a decision every day to accept these feelings so I can do what I need to do to get stronger.
I'm feeling stronger! I feel leaner although the bastard scales (and pants) don't agree
oh well
Next time I will tell you about my Secret Weapon. It's Fab!