This post breaks the cardinal LBTEPA rule ‘cheerful follows whiny’. This isn’t a cheerful post, but then neither is is it complaining or sad – actually, writing it (this is the third draft, I’m such a perfectionista LOL) has made me feel quite cheerful! So there you go.
I need your help, my friends. This is probably the most personal thing I’ve ever put into my blog. I need to cut waaaaaaaaaaaaay back on my drinking. It has crept up and up over these last few months; since I got out of the cast and life has become harder and more painful it’s got to a point where I’m a bit worried about it. This feels very shameful and I’ve been putting off writing about it – my protestant teetotal background talking. But I want to get it back under control. It’s a bad habit at this stage. Habits can change. A hard day with Noddie, yet another day banging my head on the thesis train wreck, being unable to do something I wanted to because my foot is too sore – these things do not need anaesthetic!
I don’t have a plan yet, but I have a goal. I want to go from at-least-a-couple-of-glasses-almost-every-night (my stomach turns thinking about posting that, but it’s the truth) to about twice a week. Star stickers and crossing-off boxes on my chart have proven ineffective strategies. I’ll think of something.
This issue sort of symbolises the way I feel my whole life is going – making excuses and letting my standards slip. I used to be proud of my self-discipline, and now I’m not. Even under the circumstances – yes, this has been a hard year – this has gone too far. I hope letting you guys into my shameful little secret will give me the kick up the backside I need.
...........
no, that’s really not right. Having you all on my side will give me the motivation I need. So thanks!
More anon, drinkers-in-moderation!
Saturday, August 11, 2007
Seriously, folks
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19 much-appreciated comments:
We are here for you! We are now your accountability partners, we'll need updates :-)
You can absolutely do it, its just a few itty bitty grapes!
That being said, I empathize, I love my wine (and my whine). How about logging every glass, and then figuring out a nice declining curve.
Give yourself time to heal. One glass a day is supposed to be therapeutic. Two? Well, whose looking? :-) Once you get back to training, you won't want those extras because of how they affect your workouts. And if that isn't good enough, then just don't bring it into the house. I write this as I am working on my third beer :-) I know better!
How about if I come along this journey with you? Just not tonight. LOL. I'm nursing a sore ego at not being able to race tomorrow. But after that...Honestly...I'm in with you.
And I like KLN's suggestion, logging every glass and working toward a declining curve toward a goal at some future date that doesn't seem so overwhelming.
All the best with reaching your goal. I'll be sending positive thoughts in your direction.
i don't think you need to limit the number of nights you drink - one glass a night is heaps. I started drinking out of a tiny port glass which meant that when I had filled it up ten times i had actually only had about two standard glasses. Or you can do the weight watchers trick and have a spritzer - all the taste of wine with a hell of a lot of soda water!
Ah, sister. I know this topic! Boy do I! Doesn't seem as if it's really the amount your snuggling up to, it's the reasons why you need to snuggle. Somehow it's snuck into your daily life and is playing a role there. Just pulling the vino out of the picture won't work alone -- try to figure out what you want to do in its place.
And pat yourself on the back, sweetheart. It's brave to put out there a concern like this!! We're here for ya in any way you need help. If it's bloggolisious accountability -- we're here. Emails at all hours of the day/night -- we're here, too. Ideas for distractions and special rewards -- well, you get the picture.
You know where I am, so be in touch when you need to. It's so much easier to not fall down when your eyes are wide open. :)
While wine isn't my crutch-of-choice, I do have the same feelings about food (specifically the higher the fat/sugar content the better). And I definitely feel that prior conditioning has contributed to this problem (is it just coincidence that as a child my parents never fed us junk and still "look down" on having chocolate in the house?).
So I hear you.
Congrats for coming clean.
You know where to find me. I only hope that I too can take some sort of motivation from the fact that everyone has to face their own demons too.
Jessie
Hi there
A topic close to my potential AA heart.
My advice would be to start by having to GFNs (Grog Free Nights) a week. 1-2 glasses on the other 5 is well within acceptable limits.
Then later maybe cut down to one glass a night if you want to or increase the number of GFNs you have each week.
Cheers
wildthing
Like any addiction - the hardest part comes in admiting you have an addiction. Then you need to admit that you need help in conquering the addiction. So far you are two for two.
I am a non-drinker and always have been. I have been teased, asked if I was alcoholic, you name it. It seems Aussies don't cope well with non-drinkers. For ease of explanation, I would say I was the designated driver when I went out with friends. Or I would not go out at all.
One day a friend confided in me that she WAS an alcoholic. She had joined AA and they had suggested she find activities that were not alcoholic related, or to re-work her activities so that they became non-alcohol related. She decided to spend more time with me, since I appeared to function quite well without alcohol!
One of the key points was that she should not be alone and try and battle through by herself.
I do not want to suggest that you are alcoholic, but AA is not for the completley lost and hopeless. AA can provide help BEFORE you hit rock-bottom.
The turning point for my friend was when she was arrested for drink driving. She lost her licence and her dignity. It was the boot up the backside that she needed.
This might be really out of line - but how would you explain to Noddy if there was a car accident, or if she was the passenger....
good on you for being bold and brave, mate... we'll all be here for you, in our virtual way. xxxox
I don't have a lot to add to what others already said - there's a lot of wisdom here! My drug of choice is food - more socially acceptable, perhaps, but just barely! You know what you want to do, you know why... not that it's so easy doing what we say we want (I should know) but I think you'll find a way. My mom went to AA when she realized she planned her day to make sure she got to the wine store before it closed. I'd never ever seen her drunk nor had a clue she had a problem - it was just her choice. She didn't drink for 6 or 8 or 10 years - recently has decided she can have a glass of wine at dinner and it no longer controls her.
First, there is NOTHING, I repeat NOTHING to be ashamed about.
I have the feeling that drinking is kind of a big part of the aussie culture...i mean, you have so many acronyms for it! (AFDs,wth?!)
So, that's probly a big part of it. I went through a loooooooong period of NEEDING a glass or two of wine every night when my NOD was small and I was single. It did nothing except help me gain weight. When I started running, and started having to get up at 5:30 a.m., I had to stop drinking altogether. It was pretty easy for me but then I was in a different place (time, emotions, etc.)
Do figure out why you're drinking. I'm not of the gradually cutting down school. I think you should go cold turkey. You'll be surprised at the difference in caloric intake it makes! and in performance, too. you'll see!
you've been thru a hard slog. I mean REALLY hard. If you think you're at all depressed, work on that. (I was actually self-medicating with booze. bad idea.)
Hey is this comment long enough?
Hugs :)
Hugs lbtepa. Good luck with your plan. We're here to listen and to support you.
After an alarming incident where I blacked out for more than 5 hours and done some horrible, horrible things. I decided that enough was enough and went off the grog for about 14 months.
It was an interesting expercience being alcohol free. I lost weight easily and noticed how much alcohol is revered and even encouraged in society.
During that time I did miss the social aspects of having a drink but didn't miss being shit-faced drunk.
I find that it it easier to give up something when you REALLY want to do it. Not just doing it cause you think it is the right thing to do.
Good luck with you challenge. I will be thinking of you.
I totally connected with Sparkdrivers story, hence why I have given up alcohol on three occassions (for 2 yrs once)..
Back to you, I understand that you feel it's a problem and is affecting you. So no amount of "Two drinks a day wont hurt you" will be of any help to you (in my opinion).
I think you know exactly what to do, they say admitting a problem is the first step of fixing it.
*hug*
*hugs* Well done, that must have been very hard to post.
You can do this!
*HUGS* Kudos to you for putting this out there.
I don't have much to add beyond the wisdom already provided. I just know when I started the process of eliminating unhealthy lifestyle choices I did them very gradually, in bite-size increments. This mostly related to food choices, but cutting back on alcohol was part of it too (I do love a dry vodka martini or three). This worked very well for me, and over time (4 years and counting) the tiny changes added up to a dramatic improvement in my diet and exercise habits and my non-social drinking (e.g. a random bottle of wine with Tuesday night TV) is down to practically nil (well, completely nil with the bun in the oven)... but in a way that feels normal and natural and I don't miss a thing.
Guess what I'm sayin is it sounds like you're catching yourself before you get too far along the wrong road, and maybe gradually nudging yourself the right way is all it will take to get things back where you're comfortable with them.
i can't, won't and don't have any desire to judge. i don't like the taste of alcohol, so i cannot struggle with this. i do have my own issues and know how hard it is to put the brakes on things when they sneak up like that.
talk it out.
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