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Sunday, August 29, 2010

No pressure

I know stuff. Oh yes, I do.
I feel much more calm and happy when my floors and benches are clean. Our Very Good vacuum cleaner and steam mop are investments in my mental health.
When things are ok and everyone is buzzing along nicely it's ok for spouses to function almost in parallel. But when one reveals that things are not so hoopy on Planet Spousal Unit, the other had better change her focus quicksticks and get into Looking After J mode. We're a team: united we stand!
We are very, very lucky. All is fundamentally well. We never stop counting our blessings.
The hoop-jumping required to get through my uni course is abso#$%*inglutely #$%*ing infuriating. They've got a #$%*ing nerve taking our money, the #$%*ing #$%*s. Grrrrrrrrrr.
Last week I did two things I've never done before: got an extension for an assignment the shame, the shame; and, upon realising that I'd run out of a key dinner ingredient, Gave Up. Yes, for want of some tinned tomatoes I put my kid into her dressing gown and took her through the maccas drive-through, and bought my poor husband a souvlaki from the takeaway. I am totally joining the Bad Mothers' Club.
I deal with Help-I-Have-An-Assignment-To-Do-and-I-Don't-Know-How anxiety by looking at cool shoes on the internet. Mmmmmmm......shoes.............
A good bawl for no reason and a nice sweaty bike workout improves pretty much any day.
In other news:
The fine minds here at the LBTEPA Think Tank have concluded that we Do Not Need Any More Pressure. This means I simply cannot do Super-Keen and Determined for Very Slow Marathon #3 (in 41 days, not that I'm counting). This time Effort and Will are not the answer. I have to trick my tired worried little mind into being all super-cruisy and no problemo, while still covering the required ground. Good thing LBTEPA is a woman of infinite ideas, no? Except when there are no tomatoes.
Now the Plan is This: exercise six days a week. Two mid-week runs and a long one, plus swim, ride, weights...whatever. Just move.
No clock-watching on the long runs. Rather than 9:1 or 4:1 run: walk intervals, I'm using the brilliant two songs:one song method. Mind-blowing in its simplicity, no? As long as you have an 1p0d. No stress, just music! Drink every walk break and a gel every hour. No dramas. Just right.
I've been approaching de-larding the wrong way, I think. Focusing on Not eating (or drinking yes and please don't remind me of that smug post a few months back where I boasted how I have no trouble refusing a sherby and it's all so easy - I DO AND IT ISN'T) is pretty much automatic FAIL for me, which pretty much equals automatic well I wasn't that interested anyway. I was thinking about this, and I think it will work better if I move toward what I want rather than away from what I don't want. So what do I want?
I want two things.
This number on the scales


76.*kg


and these.
Or rather, the similarly gorgeous pair waiting at the back of my wardrobe, all snuggled in their box just waiting for that happy, happy day when we can be together. Now that'll help drown out the siren call of the second helping.

Next post I'll put up a picture of the Real Shoes O'Fabulousness, and also the awesome art J and I bought at a gallery opening on the weekend. Oh I know......coo er flash eh?
More anon, mes ami!

7 much-appreciated comments:

Lisa said...

Right now I'm back out running without any short term A race on the horizon and it's turning out to be quite a good stress reliever. I think just exercising right now will be a good thing for you. :-)

Anonymous said...

Here's the thing. I think we share some of the same personality traits.

We do not need to be perfect to be loved. Noddie and J are quite rightly proued of you, because you rock.

If I believe we must be perfect to be loved, I am setting myself up to listen to the demon of fear all the fricking time (Since I'm not perfect, all these people who like me are wrong to like me, and what if they figure it out?)

Noddie will not be in therapy because she ate fast food once. (Just notice you reported on what you fed child and spouse. What did you eat?) Also, as I said on FB, my solution to that problem would have involved making a vodka sauce, which is possibly a less good solution than Maccas.

Also, wear the shoes now. Bugger it. They are pretty and make you happy. You deserve them now, since you rock.You don't need to hit a certain weight to rock, you rock now.

When I was learning to quilt, the quilting teacher taught us to say the following, if anyone made a remark about our quilts not being perfect: "That's very interesting. May I see your quilt?". Her theory was it was non-quilters that will make remarks... I've stolen that. When non-runners tell me my marathon was slow, I reply "That's very interesting, what's your personal best over the marathon distance?". (Runners understand that sometimes we have a bad day in the office, and sometimes it just doesn't work for us.)

TL:DR - You rock. Be kind to yourself.

Emma

(PS, feel free to copy, paste, and stick in on my lj every so often. It's easy to say all this, but hard to live it.)

Tea said...

omg. YOU.SO.TOTALLY.ROCK.

and you just happen to be in rare form today.

Thanks for making me laugh out loud today. :)

Anonymous said...

And I am sure that only non-mothers will ever comment on what you feed the kids! (yes I know I have no kids, but I once fed the dog a cheese sandwich when I had run out of dog food so I get it!)
Just keep on keeping on mate, you always get there.

Sara

kathrynoh said...

Just be careful with the song method. I have a live Bruce Springsteen song on my running mix that is well over 10 mins long and every time I think 'just one more song then I'll walk...' that bloody song comes on! Make a playlist of 3 min pop songs is my advice :D

Wes said...

oh, my, zebra print shoes... The world is a wonderful place :-)

the Dread Pirate Rackham said...

those look startlingly like a pair I just picked up for a song -

http://www.amazon.com/Madden-Girl-Womens-Karlla-Open-Toe/dp/B002V8XX8A

great minds and all that? I think so.