May I say, I am Not Thrilled with the way what/whoever is running my brain is going about it. Normally I wouldn't share these intimate maunderings with you, my five loyal readers, for fear of seeming self-indulgent and lame, but a) I thought someone else might read this and find it useful and b) it's my damn blog and as will be become clear, I need to stop listening to the imagined opinions of others. You well-adjusted confident types you know who you are should stop reading here and come back next post.
My perspective is all out of whack. Since mid-October I've passed all my assignments and exams, bought a house, dealt with the Spousal Unit working away all week, maintained Noddie's six-year-old world including birthday parties, dance concerts, end of school and Christmas at our place, packed up our whole place and unpacked it again in the new house, painted two bathrooms, a loo, a bedroom, a hallway and a living room, taught Noddie to ride her boogie board and tie her shoelaces and got her settled at tap dancing classes and school, started uni and a TAFE course, applied for two jobs and got an interview for one (it's on Wednesday, wish me luck!!), and cooked prawn and sweet corn chowder and a proper vegetable pie with a blind-baked bottom and a pastry lattice top. I ROCK, no?
But get this: foremost in my mind, blotting out all of the hard work and coolness of the last five months with its ludicrously inaccurately inflated proportions, is the fact that I've gained 5kg. Eleven pounds. That is pretty much all I have been thinking about in those 2 a.m. wake-and-fret fests. That one thing is the criteria by which I have been judging myself. That is MESSED UP and I'm NOT STANDING FOR IT. I have a Plan, my friends, and The Plan Is This: next time I teeter on the edge of that "weight gain => lazy/disorganised/unworthy/unhappy with my whole self" slough of despond, I'll grab the list of everything I've done, everything I've ever done in my whole life if necessary, and recite it, over and over and over again if I have to. These extra kgs are one thing. I'm doing something about them becuase I like to be able to wear all my clothes and feel comfortable in my skin. But they're not everything.
I have another question for whoever's in charge of the LBTEPA thought schema: what's with all these comparisons? Some of my good friends are really in the training and racing zone right now, pulling out 20km here and 6min/km there with insouciance and no hip soreness. I am so happy for them! I really am - but their hard work and achievements make me feel sick about what I'm not doing. I'm fearful of imagined failure and jealous of their support networks and their apparent confidence. My feet and heart are heavy with this needless burden. As of now, I PUT IT DOWN. We are women trying our best and cheering each other on. My friends are gifts!
Brain, could you make a note of the fact that NOT everything is about me? Today I was talking to a lady at my church, generally a dynamo whose conversation consists of tales of good works and improving activites. She remarked how this very hot sticky weather makes her feel like a complete dishrag - and I realised that my sloth this morning was not becuase I am a big sooky la-la lacking any discernable self-discipline. It was the weather! Must every explanation be a smothering glop of self-criticism? Hmmmmmmmmm?
I find myself thinking "I couldn't do that...." and "I'll never be able to .....". I've been too scared to go to the local tri-club training becuase I'm so slow and heavy, and I almost didn't enter the Run for The Kids because I didn't want my running friends to see me with five extra kgs! WTF IS THAT ABOUT? It's as though everything about me and anything I've ever done is meaningless in the face of being a bit lonely and a bit lardy. It's as though part of me thinks my value is associated with my weight!
THIS IS RUBBISH. My issues exist. Nothing to be done about that. But now I have recognised them for the insidious, joy-sucking harpies that they are. Let me don my tall silk issue-taming hat and my red frock coat, and pick up my whip and chair. I may have to live with them, but I'll make those little b#$!ards sit up and beg, by crikey I will. THEY WILL NOT WIN. I am LBTEPA and I DREAM BIG. I have entered the Run for The Kids and will finish, uninjured, if it takes me all day. I might even front up at the local tri club on Wednesday - I promise nothing.
Thanks for listening as I've faffed on about all this. I feel better already.
More anon, comrades!
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Friday, February 19, 2010
perfect ten
I'd like to thank the Spousal Unit for becoming the Spousal Unit ten years ago today. You're ace, S.U. 
*mwah*
*mwah*
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Huffy
To: LBTEPA
From: your knee
Subject: WTF were you thinking?
This is to protest in the strongest possible terms against the behaviour listed below, in which you have been engaging in the most cavalier and devil-may-care fashion.
- "forget" to stretch
- ditto core exercises
- gain weight
- work out with weights on what can only be (very charitably) called the most casual and inconsistent basis
- suddenly start running exclusively on unstable surfaces. Yes, yes, the river is pretty, but a sandy path requires more motion control than we're used to.
- spend a lot of time in the surf. Yes, yes, preventing Noddie from sailing to Tasmania is important, but sand and waves are hard on the knees
- suddenly start riding your bike outdoors. On the road. Up hills. Yes, yes, it's beautiful here what with the paddocks and the river and the view and all, but a little bit more little by little would be helpful. Are you picking up a theme here?
- climb up and down ladders and crawl on the floor with paintbrushes for days on end. Yes, yes, the house was a sea of blah and had to be Dealt With, but really. I don't know why you were so surprised when we jacked up.
In view of the circumstances, i.e. the chaos and excitement of the move, and the fact that you took us to the physio and have been diligent about following her exercises and training advice, we are prepared to let you off with a warning in this case.
Don't let it happen again.
Sincerely etc etc
More anon, tibia tenders!
From: your knee
Subject: WTF were you thinking?
This is to protest in the strongest possible terms against the behaviour listed below, in which you have been engaging in the most cavalier and devil-may-care fashion.
- "forget" to stretch
- ditto core exercises
- gain weight
- work out with weights on what can only be (very charitably) called the most casual and inconsistent basis
- suddenly start running exclusively on unstable surfaces. Yes, yes, the river is pretty, but a sandy path requires more motion control than we're used to.
- spend a lot of time in the surf. Yes, yes, preventing Noddie from sailing to Tasmania is important, but sand and waves are hard on the knees
- suddenly start riding your bike outdoors. On the road. Up hills. Yes, yes, it's beautiful here what with the paddocks and the river and the view and all, but a little bit more little by little would be helpful. Are you picking up a theme here?
- climb up and down ladders and crawl on the floor with paintbrushes for days on end. Yes, yes, the house was a sea of blah and had to be Dealt With, but really. I don't know why you were so surprised when we jacked up.
In view of the circumstances, i.e. the chaos and excitement of the move, and the fact that you took us to the physio and have been diligent about following her exercises and training advice, we are prepared to let you off with a warning in this case.
Don't let it happen again.
Sincerely etc etc
More anon, tibia tenders!
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
painting lessons
As I have mentioned, when we moved into our nice new house it was a sea (a swamp?) of BEIGE. I. Don't. Like. BEIGE. I do like painting, so BEIGE's days were numbered.
Painting can be quite the philosophical experience, you know. Listen to music, fill the tray, wipe the roller.... all very meditative. I will share with you now, if I may, the Wisdom of the Fumes.
1. There's no hurry. It doesn't matter if it takes all day, or two weeks. If you know what you want and keep at it, you'll get there.
2. Some things just aren't that important. If people think less of you for something as small as getting paint on the light switch, they're not your friends.
3. Being careful is important. However, sometimes it's more conducive to your happiness to not be too fussy.
4. You can't kid yourself that you like something when you don't. It won't take. Better to do something about it.
5. It's ok to want things to be different.
6. Don't panic if it looks wrong at first.
7. Wait until you can see the whole thing before you decide whether it's a disaster.
8. Sometimes something you'd never have even thought of turns out to be a really good idea.
9. Changing your world takes a fair bit of work, but it's very satisfying and easier than you think.
10. Painting the living room is a good way to celebrate your birthday.
Riding a very long bumpy slide down a hillside five times with a tummy full of prawns and champagne is a new one for me, but I can feel a tradition coming on...........
More anon, Rembrandts!
Painting can be quite the philosophical experience, you know. Listen to music, fill the tray, wipe the roller.... all very meditative. I will share with you now, if I may, the Wisdom of the Fumes.
1. There's no hurry. It doesn't matter if it takes all day, or two weeks. If you know what you want and keep at it, you'll get there.
2. Some things just aren't that important. If people think less of you for something as small as getting paint on the light switch, they're not your friends.
3. Being careful is important. However, sometimes it's more conducive to your happiness to not be too fussy.
4. You can't kid yourself that you like something when you don't. It won't take. Better to do something about it.
5. It's ok to want things to be different.
6. Don't panic if it looks wrong at first.
7. Wait until you can see the whole thing before you decide whether it's a disaster.
8. Sometimes something you'd never have even thought of turns out to be a really good idea.
9. Changing your world takes a fair bit of work, but it's very satisfying and easier than you think.
10. Painting the living room is a good way to celebrate your birthday.
Riding a very long bumpy slide down a hillside five times with a tummy full of prawns and champagne is a new one for me, but I can feel a tradition coming on...........More anon, Rembrandts!
Thursday, February 04, 2010
Thursday
Hello there! I write to you, my five faithful readers, from the rural fastness of my (almost) fully assembled, unpacked, unfolded and organised new home. It's nice here. I hope you are all well and enjoying this lovely summer weather, unless you're from the other hemisphere, in which case *snicker*
So much has happened at the new Casa del LBTEPA that I hardly know where to begin.
1. Here is a really truly true Public Service Announcement. As my five faithful readers well know, my sinuses and I have a very special relationship. I hate them; they turn on me at the slightest provocation. Taking them to live in the dusty, pollen-y, smoky (from bushfires) country was possibly not the best idea. In an effort to function I started taking some OTC sinus pain medication that I've had before. I was taking it as infrequently as possible, not even close to the maximum dose. I was finding the unpacking and looking after Noddie a real struggle and was even worried I was falling back into clinical depression again. And then..... I was about to slurp down a couple more of these sinus pills, when I noticed on the package in teeny tiny letters that people taking antidepressants should consult their doctors before using this stuff. Hmmm, I thought, I'm not on ADs but I am feeling more and more thoroughly and pervasively gloomy with every passing day. I don't think I'll take any more of these. So I didn't.
Well let me tell you, my five faithful readers, it was like a switch being thrown. Within 24 hours I was my old irritatingly cheerful bundle-of-energy self. With a face that feels as though it's full of acid, yes, but I'm working on that with stuff that doesn't suck all the joy out of life. So - yes, I have finally got to the point - if you have sinus problems in summer and experience any sort of lowered mood, check what you're taking. Those things are poison to me and they might be to you too.
2. In a sensational piece of serendipity, a friend of mine needed a new home just as we left our old place. Tenants, anyone? We're so thrilled - they're no-BS people, old hands at renting and happy to tell us what we need to do to be good landlords.
3. One of the most fun things about moving house is that you can throw out all your old scruffy tea-towels and get nice new matching ones. Ditto bath mats.
4. Mum gave me a tape measure and matching stanley knife, all covered in roses so the Spousal Unit won't take them to the Shed O'Doom from whence nothing returns. Yes, there's one here too.
5. I love my tape measure. I have a lot of stuff on my walls, and in this house it's perfectly straight, and aligned to perfection.
6. We seem to have acquired two new dogs. They are exact replicas of our previous dogs, but don't bark at the next door dogs or pull washing off the line!
7. When we moved in, every single room in this nice big house was BEIGE. I hate beige. Hate. It. since Noddie started school on Monday I have painted her room pink and purple, as requested - with butterflies! It's too cute! - and the bathroom, en suite and loo pale yellow. They look smashing. Next week I'll transform the front living room from a blah approximation of cosy to a white chocolate den of yumminess. I'm not doing it tomorrow because the job involves unpacking three large bookshelves, and I do need to start organising the filing cabinet some time. Although it might be a good beach day............
8. Noddie has become a complete daredevil on her boogie board. I love going to the beach with her. She's a legend.
9. The view from our front verandah is a few rows of houses and then rolling hills.
10. I live five minutes' walk from the river track. Seeing the sun come up as you run beside the water is exactly as perfect as it sounds.
11.Rain smells so good here. I'm going to go and sit on the verandah for a while before I go to bed.
So when are you coming to stay? Hop on the train, we'll pick you up from the station!
More anon, future guests!
So much has happened at the new Casa del LBTEPA that I hardly know where to begin.
1. Here is a really truly true Public Service Announcement. As my five faithful readers well know, my sinuses and I have a very special relationship. I hate them; they turn on me at the slightest provocation. Taking them to live in the dusty, pollen-y, smoky (from bushfires) country was possibly not the best idea. In an effort to function I started taking some OTC sinus pain medication that I've had before. I was taking it as infrequently as possible, not even close to the maximum dose. I was finding the unpacking and looking after Noddie a real struggle and was even worried I was falling back into clinical depression again. And then..... I was about to slurp down a couple more of these sinus pills, when I noticed on the package in teeny tiny letters that people taking antidepressants should consult their doctors before using this stuff. Hmmm, I thought, I'm not on ADs but I am feeling more and more thoroughly and pervasively gloomy with every passing day. I don't think I'll take any more of these. So I didn't.
Well let me tell you, my five faithful readers, it was like a switch being thrown. Within 24 hours I was my old irritatingly cheerful bundle-of-energy self. With a face that feels as though it's full of acid, yes, but I'm working on that with stuff that doesn't suck all the joy out of life. So - yes, I have finally got to the point - if you have sinus problems in summer and experience any sort of lowered mood, check what you're taking. Those things are poison to me and they might be to you too.
2. In a sensational piece of serendipity, a friend of mine needed a new home just as we left our old place. Tenants, anyone? We're so thrilled - they're no-BS people, old hands at renting and happy to tell us what we need to do to be good landlords.
3. One of the most fun things about moving house is that you can throw out all your old scruffy tea-towels and get nice new matching ones. Ditto bath mats.
4. Mum gave me a tape measure and matching stanley knife, all covered in roses so the Spousal Unit won't take them to the Shed O'Doom from whence nothing returns. Yes, there's one here too.
5. I love my tape measure. I have a lot of stuff on my walls, and in this house it's perfectly straight, and aligned to perfection.
6. We seem to have acquired two new dogs. They are exact replicas of our previous dogs, but don't bark at the next door dogs or pull washing off the line!
7. When we moved in, every single room in this nice big house was BEIGE. I hate beige. Hate. It. since Noddie started school on Monday I have painted her room pink and purple, as requested - with butterflies! It's too cute! - and the bathroom, en suite and loo pale yellow. They look smashing. Next week I'll transform the front living room from a blah approximation of cosy to a white chocolate den of yumminess. I'm not doing it tomorrow because the job involves unpacking three large bookshelves, and I do need to start organising the filing cabinet some time. Although it might be a good beach day............
8. Noddie has become a complete daredevil on her boogie board. I love going to the beach with her. She's a legend.
9. The view from our front verandah is a few rows of houses and then rolling hills.
10. I live five minutes' walk from the river track. Seeing the sun come up as you run beside the water is exactly as perfect as it sounds.
11.Rain smells so good here. I'm going to go and sit on the verandah for a while before I go to bed.
So when are you coming to stay? Hop on the train, we'll pick you up from the station!
More anon, future guests!
Monday, January 18, 2010
Phew
So here we are.
2 containers of stuff on a BIIIIIIIG truck
500000000000000 boxes, about 90% unpacked
25 trips to the shops to get storage stuff - whoever thought it was a good idea to have no drawers in a walk-in wardrobe? But then, I do have a walk-in wardrobe *beams*
1 new hat for 1 day at the races
1 seven hour round trip back to Melbourne to bring our dogs to their new home
0 exercise. This WILL change TODAY
Feeling a bit like a duck - smooth and unruffled on the surface.......
More anon, paddlers!
2 containers of stuff on a BIIIIIIIG truck
500000000000000 boxes, about 90% unpacked
25 trips to the shops to get storage stuff - whoever thought it was a good idea to have no drawers in a walk-in wardrobe? But then, I do have a walk-in wardrobe *beams*
1 new hat for 1 day at the races
1 seven hour round trip back to Melbourne to bring our dogs to their new home
0 exercise. This WILL change TODAY
Feeling a bit like a duck - smooth and unruffled on the surface.......
More anon, paddlers!
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Transitions
It's nice and quiet here this morning. The Spousal Unit and Noddie have gone to the hardware shop to get some new toilets (or I think that's what they said). It's cooler today, thank goodness. We were staying cheerful in the heat, of course - we're lucky, we have air-conditioning - but getting really tired. There's been a lot going on.
J's nanna's funeral was on Friday. She was 91 and I didn't know her very well, but it was a sad day.
1. If your mother was a member of a church for fifty-four years, refusing to have a religious service because you're "not comfortable with religion" is LAME. It's not about you. ( J's parents were not involved in this decision, btw)
2. Having the funeral on the other side of the city, effectively preventing her church friends from attending, is thoughtless at the very least.
3. I've told J that, should I predecease him, no-one involved in the service is to have fascinatingly elaborate hair, and if there are any Helen Steiner Rice poems read, I will come back and haunt him. No offence, they're just not my taste.
4. If you were forced to pick, a stinking hot day for a funeral is better than a rainy day.
5. A summer funeral is a wardrobe challenge, but if you could wear an outfit to a nightclub, it's not appropriate for a funeral. We know you're young and hot, but once again, it's not about you.
6. The nasty remarks you make about your nephew's wife organising a service at your mother's church for her friends after the interment will be repeated back to her. She will think you are sad. But every single member of the family showing up to that service was a Good Thing. Very well played.
7. Funerals make people go a bit mental. J's family are really a very nice lot.
We are in a world of boxes, paper, tape and permanent markers at the moment. When Noddie bounces into our room each morning at WTFtimeisit o'clock and announces how many days it is until the moving truck comes (today, Sunday, four), we cringe. Still, we're muddling through.
1. PMS is a bitch and a master of totally wrong and unfair timing. At least I know why no carb in the house has been safe.
2. Champagne might not be the answer, but it helps pass the time until you work it out. I am trying my best to be sensible, but looking forward to being settled again so I can work on my dysfunctional coping strategies.
3. The week before you move 300km IS the best time to get back into a daily exercise habit. It's been hard at times - and MASSIVE THANKS to our darling neighbour for minding Noddie while I went for a run - but I've felt so much better for it.
4. Pack the scales early. You don't need to be thinking about how lardy you've accidentally become.
5. Things pass. Gloom passes, feeling overwhelmed and unsupported passes. Accepting and naming and sitting with the feelings, challenging irrational thoughts - it works. As does just getting on with it. A packed box is a beautiful thing. Anger passes. Biting my tongue is a gift to myself as well as the Spousal Unit.
6. You can't take too much Rescue Remedy. Trust me, I'd know if you could.
7. I don't know how people move house when there's no sport on TV.
8. Noddie and the Spousal Unit are cool and I'm lucky to have them.
9. This, the only un-wrapped picture left in the house, is our motto for the move.
10. New shoes fix everything.
More anon, my lovelies! See you on the other side of the state!
J's nanna's funeral was on Friday. She was 91 and I didn't know her very well, but it was a sad day.
1. If your mother was a member of a church for fifty-four years, refusing to have a religious service because you're "not comfortable with religion" is LAME. It's not about you. ( J's parents were not involved in this decision, btw)
2. Having the funeral on the other side of the city, effectively preventing her church friends from attending, is thoughtless at the very least.
3. I've told J that, should I predecease him, no-one involved in the service is to have fascinatingly elaborate hair, and if there are any Helen Steiner Rice poems read, I will come back and haunt him. No offence, they're just not my taste.
4. If you were forced to pick, a stinking hot day for a funeral is better than a rainy day.
5. A summer funeral is a wardrobe challenge, but if you could wear an outfit to a nightclub, it's not appropriate for a funeral. We know you're young and hot, but once again, it's not about you.
6. The nasty remarks you make about your nephew's wife organising a service at your mother's church for her friends after the interment will be repeated back to her. She will think you are sad. But every single member of the family showing up to that service was a Good Thing. Very well played.
7. Funerals make people go a bit mental. J's family are really a very nice lot.
We are in a world of boxes, paper, tape and permanent markers at the moment. When Noddie bounces into our room each morning at WTFtimeisit o'clock and announces how many days it is until the moving truck comes (today, Sunday, four), we cringe. Still, we're muddling through.
1. PMS is a bitch and a master of totally wrong and unfair timing. At least I know why no carb in the house has been safe.
2. Champagne might not be the answer, but it helps pass the time until you work it out. I am trying my best to be sensible, but looking forward to being settled again so I can work on my dysfunctional coping strategies.
3. The week before you move 300km IS the best time to get back into a daily exercise habit. It's been hard at times - and MASSIVE THANKS to our darling neighbour for minding Noddie while I went for a run - but I've felt so much better for it.
4. Pack the scales early. You don't need to be thinking about how lardy you've accidentally become.
5. Things pass. Gloom passes, feeling overwhelmed and unsupported passes. Accepting and naming and sitting with the feelings, challenging irrational thoughts - it works. As does just getting on with it. A packed box is a beautiful thing. Anger passes. Biting my tongue is a gift to myself as well as the Spousal Unit.
6. You can't take too much Rescue Remedy. Trust me, I'd know if you could.
7. I don't know how people move house when there's no sport on TV.
8. Noddie and the Spousal Unit are cool and I'm lucky to have them.
9. This, the only un-wrapped picture left in the house, is our motto for the move.
10. New shoes fix everything.
More anon, my lovelies! See you on the other side of the state!
Sunday, January 03, 2010
Straight Up
I was going to wrap this post about my plans for 2010 in reflections and cogitations and the difference between goals and aspirations.... and how I'm scared to write them down becuase they are pretty difficult to make failure-proof....and that would have taken me another week to craft into a big slab of pretty words which are actually just talking-about-myself-instead-of-getting-on-with-it...........
but that's all just BS and pandering to my paralysing fear of the Failure Monster.
My goals for 2010 are
1. lose 8kg
2. finish the Melbourne Marathon again
2a. depending on what kind of work I find when we move, do the full marathon at the Gold Coast.
Better get on with it, eh? I'll just have another cuppa first
More anon, full steamers-ahead!
but that's all just BS and pandering to my paralysing fear of the Failure Monster.
My goals for 2010 are
1. lose 8kg
2. finish the Melbourne Marathon again
2a. depending on what kind of work I find when we move, do the full marathon at the Gold Coast.
Better get on with it, eh? I'll just have another cuppa first
More anon, full steamers-ahead!
Monday, December 28, 2009
Happy Old Year!
Hi there sports fans! How the heck art thou? Have you been keeping well? Did Santa do the right thing? We here at Chateau LBTEPA have had a splendid Christmas, thanks very much *beams* Definitely one of the best.
We had our traditional Christmas eve fish and chip picnic, on the living room floor becuase it was bucketing down outside, then watched theMuppet Christmas Carol movie. Noddie slept in until 7.30am, God bless her, so we were woken to the strains of "oh, wow! Mummy! Daddy! Look what Santa brought me!" The good Saint somehow knew her shoe size and tastes; to my knowledge she hasn't taken off her sequinned slippers except to go to bed. After church my brother came over and we went to the park for a not-very-grand-but scrumptious lunch of barbecued tiger prawns and warm roast pork and caramelised veges spread on crusty rolls.
Brother had to go to work becuase the big sweety had swapped his morning shift with a divorced colleague so he (the colleague) could see his kids). We each - Noddie under the strongest possible protest - had a nanna nap before my other brothers and sisters and the inlaws arrived for dinner. Everyone brought something so I just provided dessert (Christmas pudding and white christmas, mmmm instant hyperglycaemia) and a festive tree for the annual present madness. We were sad that my dad wasn't well enough to travel so we were missing him and Mum, but it was lovely to see my aunt and uncle who haven't joined us for the last couple of years. We talked and laughed and ate and opened presents and ate and laughed some more.
I wasn't going to mention my present from Noddie here, but I thought it might make Emma laugh. Father Christmas was also good enough to bring me a very good quality print of one of my favourite paintings. I'll get it framed for my birthday in February.
Apart from that
- I'm unemployed! I finished up at work on Christmas Eve. I felt really sad about leaving and on and off still do. There was no card, no cake, no nothing , way to value your staff, eh? - but I'll always be grateful for the opportunity to connect with those thousands of callers, and of course for my massively skilled, funny and compassionate colleagues.
- I'm sleeping like a brick for at least an hour each afternoon and then perfectly well at night! If this keeps up I'm getting my iron and thyroid tested, this is ridiculous.
- I'm really really disappointed to not be racing the Olympic distance tri I hoped to do in two weeks. Three or four forty minute training sessions a week for the last couple of months won't cut it, and we may be moving house around that time as well. We hope. Don't ask.
- As the magnificent Kathryn pointed out, that b#$%* the Motivation Fairy never ever shows up when you need her, i.e. after an extended scoff-fest and exercise layoff. YOU have to do it yourself, damnit. YOU have to say, well, I've put the demands of family ahead of my health and exercise needs for a few weeks, and that was the right thing to do. But now I need to climb Mt Too Busy, Mt Too Hard and Mt I've Got So Lardy This Feels Yucky and fly the twin banners I Can and I Will.
- We gave J a GPS for his birthday yesterday. He loves it.
- I got home all sticky and sweaty and grinning like an idiot from my run today that I just took the time for even though there were 10000 things I could have been doing, and it wasn't just because our friends were forcing, er, helping the Spousal Unit to clean up the back yard and fix the gutters.
- I'm going into the city tomorrow for breakfast with Debi! Social anxiety be damned (I've already planned what to wear) - I love meeting blog friends! And it'll be a beautiful hot day.
- Do you make resolutions? Do you have any goals for 2010? I have some in mind but am a bit scared of the Failure Monster.
More anon, revellers!
We had our traditional Christmas eve fish and chip picnic, on the living room floor becuase it was bucketing down outside, then watched theMuppet Christmas Carol movie. Noddie slept in until 7.30am, God bless her, so we were woken to the strains of "oh, wow! Mummy! Daddy! Look what Santa brought me!" The good Saint somehow knew her shoe size and tastes; to my knowledge she hasn't taken off her sequinned slippers except to go to bed. After church my brother came over and we went to the park for a not-very-grand-but scrumptious lunch of barbecued tiger prawns and warm roast pork and caramelised veges spread on crusty rolls.
Brother had to go to work becuase the big sweety had swapped his morning shift with a divorced colleague so he (the colleague) could see his kids). We each - Noddie under the strongest possible protest - had a nanna nap before my other brothers and sisters and the inlaws arrived for dinner. Everyone brought something so I just provided dessert (Christmas pudding and white christmas, mmmm instant hyperglycaemia) and a festive tree for the annual present madness. We were sad that my dad wasn't well enough to travel so we were missing him and Mum, but it was lovely to see my aunt and uncle who haven't joined us for the last couple of years. We talked and laughed and ate and opened presents and ate and laughed some more.
I wasn't going to mention my present from Noddie here, but I thought it might make Emma laugh. Father Christmas was also good enough to bring me a very good quality print of one of my favourite paintings. I'll get it framed for my birthday in February.
Apart from that
- I'm unemployed! I finished up at work on Christmas Eve. I felt really sad about leaving and on and off still do. There was no card, no cake, no nothing , way to value your staff, eh? - but I'll always be grateful for the opportunity to connect with those thousands of callers, and of course for my massively skilled, funny and compassionate colleagues.
- I'm sleeping like a brick for at least an hour each afternoon and then perfectly well at night! If this keeps up I'm getting my iron and thyroid tested, this is ridiculous.
- I'm really really disappointed to not be racing the Olympic distance tri I hoped to do in two weeks. Three or four forty minute training sessions a week for the last couple of months won't cut it, and we may be moving house around that time as well. We hope. Don't ask.
- As the magnificent Kathryn pointed out, that b#$%* the Motivation Fairy never ever shows up when you need her, i.e. after an extended scoff-fest and exercise layoff. YOU have to do it yourself, damnit. YOU have to say, well, I've put the demands of family ahead of my health and exercise needs for a few weeks, and that was the right thing to do. But now I need to climb Mt Too Busy, Mt Too Hard and Mt I've Got So Lardy This Feels Yucky and fly the twin banners I Can and I Will.
- We gave J a GPS for his birthday yesterday. He loves it.
- I got home all sticky and sweaty and grinning like an idiot from my run today that I just took the time for even though there were 10000 things I could have been doing, and it wasn't just because our friends were forcing, er, helping the Spousal Unit to clean up the back yard and fix the gutters.
- I'm going into the city tomorrow for breakfast with Debi! Social anxiety be damned (I've already planned what to wear) - I love meeting blog friends! And it'll be a beautiful hot day.
- Do you make resolutions? Do you have any goals for 2010? I have some in mind but am a bit scared of the Failure Monster.
More anon, revellers!
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Ding dong merrily on high
I love Christmas. It's a bit mental this year what with the Spousal Unit being away during the week and having to move 300km in a week or so - probably why I completely forgot two lots of interstate guests, good thing I haven't put the spare room bed on the nature strip yet, eh? - but Good King Wenceslas didn't whinge about chilblains and Caspar, Balthazar and Melchior weren't grizzling about camel chafing! Joy to the world, my lovelies!I was getting a bit overwhelmed by it all but then my Tiresome Cheery Friend popped by to share some holiday bonhomie, and I decided to just enjoy it all. Key word: DECIDED. As I say to Noddie all the time (poor child), you decide what you think about things. You decide whether you see all the good things around you or only the bad stuff. YOU DECIDE.
So I am having a splendid time going through my cupboards, chucking stuff out, ok ok mostly J's stuff and putting things in boxes. Tonight I'll be thoroughly enjoying myself packing the quite startling number of ornaments in my house, recalling all the stories attached to each object - oh, and watching Hogfather and eating mince pies! I have to make my Christmas pudding too - I was going to use my usual recipe but I've packed my cookbooks, oops.
You know how sometimes your brain turns on you and tries to convince you that since you've put on a bit of weight lately you're so utterly lazy/hopeless/completely lacking in any sort of /charm/moral fibre/personal worth that you'd best eschew the glam frock and shroud yourself in baggy dowdy black? Oh, you don't? Well anyway, that was where I was on Friday night -almost hyperventilating with anxiety about what to wear to my work party (flash CBD bar) and CR bash (Y&Js). I had to channel my wonderful friend Mary Sunshine who wears whatever she jolly well pleases and always looks AWESOME. I took a few deep breaths and prepared to pretend to be my fabulous self. I didn't have to fake it for long - I had a brilliant time at both parties in my short blue dress and heels and caught the last train home. What a high-stepper! I was a bit sad when I thought someone had stolen my sunglasses at the CR party, but my friend found them! Another win!
Next morning J and I did a power shop (all Noddie's presents in 45 minutes) then had a family outing into the city. J hadn't been to the Hari Krsna restaurant so Noddie and I took him there for lunch and then a trip up the Eureka Tower, which was really fun. On our way we came across the AC/DC exhibition at the Arts Centre. Three words: Too Much Fun! More words: Go And See It! Oh my but I was weary after all that and my large Friday night, so it was nap time for LBTEPA before we trotted off to friends' for dinner. Let's just say it wasn't Noddie who fell asleep on the way home.
Sunday was another lovely day; Sunday school in the morning so Noddie could get her prize, then friends over for dinner before the church carol service. I love singing carols - it's like breathing joy! And I've been practicing in the car on the way to work so I could do all the high parts, such fun! Noel! Noel! Born is the King of Israel!
In health and exercise news.... ummmmmmm........I'm working out almost every day but feeling aimless without a specific race goal. Snacking like the offspring of a pacman and a combine harvester isn't helping either. I'm feeling uncomfrotable and bloated and cross with myself. The time has come, people, to Reverse The Slide.
My interim goal weight is 75kg. Now the Plan Is This. I nicked it from the mighty Duane, who is living by the credo WWAID? - What Would An Ironman Do? My Plan is WWASKPD? What Would A Seventy-Five Kg Person Do? She'd eat toast at home for breakfast rather than getting a coffee scroll on the way, and would eat her homemade soup for lunch instead of a focaccia. She'd exercise daily and drink a lot of water. She'd enjoy Christmas food and drink, but in moderation. As shall I!
Now, all I have to do in the next couple of days is finish up at work, make the pudding and Christmas biscuits with Noddie, buy the Spousal Unit's present and wrap the last two left undone, and do the bare minimum of housework to render the place habitable when the rellies roll in on Christmas afternoon. We'll start the day with NODDIE'S PRESENTS FROM SANTA (don't think she doesn't know how many sleeps there are to go), then church, an elaborate picnic, including a mountain of prawns mmmmmmmm in the park with my brother and finally the family talk-, eat- and present-fest.
And you? How do you celebrate? Do tell!
Have yourselves a merry little Christmas, my friends.Peace on earth and goodwill to men.
Monday, December 14, 2009
As simple as that
*waves at new commenter* you are SO RIGHT - swimming in the sea IS bliss. Cold, salty, rough, tiring BLISS.
I hadn't been looking forward to the Brighton swim because I've done perhaps 8km in training since April. Also it had got mixed up in the feeling-sorry-for-myself miasma through which I have lately been stumbling. You know the drill... I've put on heaps of weight and lost all my fitness since the marathon, I'm not racing triathlon this summer, poor me AND I feel like a blob. Silly! Silly! I know! I know!
From that pity-party I segued to a cunningly disguised bit of FIGJAM, a la "well I don't really feel like it, but since I can do it and I know lots of people who'd love to be able to do it, I should do it, it's almost my duty!" Can anyone say watch out LBTEPA, you'll put your back out carrying around all that EGO?
Luckily I must have tripped over it and fallen back through the wormhole to reality at some stage. What was really happening ? I got to swim the Brighton 4km, that's what! I love that swim! I look forward to it for weeks, training or no training. Simple as that!I hadn't been looking forward to the Brighton swim because I've done perhaps 8km in training since April. Also it had got mixed up in the feeling-sorry-for-myself miasma through which I have lately been stumbling. You know the drill... I've put on heaps of weight and lost all my fitness since the marathon, I'm not racing triathlon this summer, poor me AND I feel like a blob. Silly! Silly! I know! I know!
From that pity-party I segued to a cunningly disguised bit of FIGJAM, a la "well I don't really feel like it, but since I can do it and I know lots of people who'd love to be able to do it, I should do it, it's almost my duty!" Can anyone say watch out LBTEPA, you'll put your back out carrying around all that EGO?
I didn't sleep well on Friday night, the old wake-up-every-hour-so-as-not-to-miss-the-alarm thing, but in the morning I felt happy and excited. Sleep schmeep. My bag was packed, my nails were red, and the swim didn't start until 9am so I didn't have to leave until 7. Too good!
The swim course at Brighton is a bit tricky. The beach runs north/south. You head out diagonally from the start to the first marker buoy, then turn left (north). This is the shoreward side of a long narrow rectangle, which you do twice before swimming back in. The weather at Brighton is always rubbish. The last two years it's been windy and pouring rain - which actually flattens out the swell a bit, and it's a beautiful feeling floating in a white world of rain and sky. This year we were handed a six-to-eight-foot swell and a strong southerly current. It was mad! I was literally swimming diagonally the whole time just to stay on course. The swell was so high I had to wait until I was carried to the top to see the next buoy, or even my horizon marker, and in the time it took to sight I'd be carried off course again. I was constantly correcting - riiiiide to the top, check, veer back, do it again. The waves just rolled and rolled and rolled, uuuuuuuuuuup and doooown, uuuuuuuuup and dowwwwwn. Depending on the direction you were swimming it felt as though you were falling or swimming uphill. People were vomiting and DNFing from motion sickness.
Chugging along at the back, of course, I was oblivious and having THE BEST TIME EVER. It was glorious. I got pretty tired pretty early (see "amount of training since April") but that was a blessing in a way becuase once it was clear that There Would Be No Speed, I just melted into a rhythm that I could keep going forever. Life became the water and my thoughts. My mantras. Catch, catch, (reminding me to concentrate on the front of my stroke) touch, touch (= touch my thumb on my thigh, reminding me to keep my stroke long), kick, kick....up and down and on and on.
At the 2km mark I sucked down the gel I'd stashed in my wetsuit leg. Mine is knee-length so no contortions were required - but may I say, even vanilla gel + seawater = major bleh! The wind was picking up and so were the waves. It became more difficult to stay on course. The most important thing was not to fight the water. Just roll with it, slide off it, let it do its thing, and keep correcting.
I was so happy out there, just swimming. That was what life was all about. At one stage the sun came out and the water glittered like diamonds. It was so beautiful my eyes filled with tears. I found myself murmuring, thank you, God, that I should have such a life and get to do these things. It felt as though I was floating in infinity, just me and the waves and the glittering sunlight.
I almost didn't want to go in - but only partly becuase then my favourite swim would be over. There was also the absolute bitch of a southerly side-sweep to contend with. I felt as though I was inching toward my sight markers; first the lifesaving club roof, then the bathing boxes. They were pretty but I could have cared less. Finally I could see the finish banner. The current kept trying to pull me away from it but I kept on reaching and rolling and catching and kicking until my hand touched the sand. Done.
The swim course at Brighton is a bit tricky. The beach runs north/south. You head out diagonally from the start to the first marker buoy, then turn left (north). This is the shoreward side of a long narrow rectangle, which you do twice before swimming back in. The weather at Brighton is always rubbish. The last two years it's been windy and pouring rain - which actually flattens out the swell a bit, and it's a beautiful feeling floating in a white world of rain and sky. This year we were handed a six-to-eight-foot swell and a strong southerly current. It was mad! I was literally swimming diagonally the whole time just to stay on course. The swell was so high I had to wait until I was carried to the top to see the next buoy, or even my horizon marker, and in the time it took to sight I'd be carried off course again. I was constantly correcting - riiiiide to the top, check, veer back, do it again. The waves just rolled and rolled and rolled, uuuuuuuuuuup and doooown, uuuuuuuuup and dowwwwwn. Depending on the direction you were swimming it felt as though you were falling or swimming uphill. People were vomiting and DNFing from motion sickness.
Chugging along at the back, of course, I was oblivious and having THE BEST TIME EVER. It was glorious. I got pretty tired pretty early (see "amount of training since April") but that was a blessing in a way becuase once it was clear that There Would Be No Speed, I just melted into a rhythm that I could keep going forever. Life became the water and my thoughts. My mantras. Catch, catch, (reminding me to concentrate on the front of my stroke) touch, touch (= touch my thumb on my thigh, reminding me to keep my stroke long), kick, kick....up and down and on and on.
At the 2km mark I sucked down the gel I'd stashed in my wetsuit leg. Mine is knee-length so no contortions were required - but may I say, even vanilla gel + seawater = major bleh! The wind was picking up and so were the waves. It became more difficult to stay on course. The most important thing was not to fight the water. Just roll with it, slide off it, let it do its thing, and keep correcting.
I was so happy out there, just swimming. That was what life was all about. At one stage the sun came out and the water glittered like diamonds. It was so beautiful my eyes filled with tears. I found myself murmuring, thank you, God, that I should have such a life and get to do these things. It felt as though I was floating in infinity, just me and the waves and the glittering sunlight.
I almost didn't want to go in - but only partly becuase then my favourite swim would be over. There was also the absolute bitch of a southerly side-sweep to contend with. I felt as though I was inching toward my sight markers; first the lifesaving club roof, then the bathing boxes. They were pretty but I could have cared less. Finally I could see the finish banner. The current kept trying to pull me away from it but I kept on reaching and rolling and catching and kicking until my hand touched the sand. Done.
*grins*
As simple as that.
More anon, blessing-counters!
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Lucky
I get to swim 4km in the sea this morning :)
I CANNOT TELL YOU how much I have been looking forward to this.
Training schmaining, prepared schmepared. I won't swim my best time, but I'll HAVE the BEST TIME.
*grins like an idiot*
In other news, things - house settlement, moving plans/progress, J's work, end-of-year school/church stuff - are just MENTAL. But in a good way.
More anon, aquanauts
I CANNOT TELL YOU how much I have been looking forward to this.
Training schmaining, prepared schmepared. I won't swim my best time, but I'll HAVE the BEST TIME.
*grins like an idiot*
In other news, things - house settlement, moving plans/progress, J's work, end-of-year school/church stuff - are just MENTAL. But in a good way.
More anon, aquanauts
Thursday, December 03, 2009
Thursday thirteen (shamelessly swiped from Iron Misty)
1.What do I want for Christmas? Normally when the spousal Unit says why don't you get yourself something? I snarl put in some b**** effort (or words to that effect), but this year he's so very overwhelmed by the new job, not to mention being 300km away, that I have relented and actually made the offer to be my own Santa. But I can't think of anything! I'm attracted to this, as I hear it's very dark in the country, but I dunno...maybe something frivolous? Help!
2. I want to run another marathon next year. There, I've said it. Alas, however, my sacroiliac joint didn't take all that kindly to the last one - although we've reached an understanding of sorts, I might not have it rehabbed in time to build up for the run I want to do in April (and that's if it's actually on). Ever the optimist, my Plan (of course I have one) is to press gamely on with the standing-on-one-leg/rubber band thing and hope for the best.
3. Chips are evil. Especially when J is stress-eating.
4. Noddie's dance concert was last night. It was wonderful and adorable and now I want to learn to tap dance.
5. This Friday night everything in our house that stays still long enough will be covered in tinsel. It's going to be pretty and sparkly and Christmassy to look at instead of the messy half-packed disorganisation that is starting to mess with my head.
6. A bloke at my work, who is about my age, was really surprised that I recognised his Dead Kennedys t-shirt. I clearly need a de-frumping makeover. Why don't I look as though I have an interesting life? Or maybe surprising people is good?......I dunno
7. I really really do need to stop eating. It won't pack anything.
8. The reason all my Christmas presents are bought, wrapped and labelled already is not because I'm organised. It's because I'll do pretty much anything to avoid shopping in December. I forgot I was doing prayers at church last week (see? Not organised); while I was winging it in the pulpit I believe something resembling the phrase "if I'm bad in this life, I'll end up somewhere like Northland when I die" may have passed my lips.
9. I'm going to write our Christmas letter tonight, always good fun. S0 many exciting things have happened this year!
10. I FOUND MY ADDRESS BOOK!! It's been missing for weeks! It was in the passenger side door pocket of my car - I hardly ever sit there so it didn't occur to me to look. Yay!
11. Stupid vendors' stupid solicitor is taking FOREVER to get the stupid paperwork for the stupid new house organised, so it looks as though settlement won't be until FOREVER. Thank goodness for mince pies
12. I have a job interview for J's new shop next Monday. DON'T LAUGH. I'll be driving up and back (700km round trip) for the group interview. Nervous? Moi? Why can't they just give me the job? Whatever happened to nepotism?
13. If you don't like Christmas carols, don't get into my car. Ding dong merrily on high, people!
More anon, mince pie fans...........mmmmmmm.........mince pies..........
2. I want to run another marathon next year. There, I've said it. Alas, however, my sacroiliac joint didn't take all that kindly to the last one - although we've reached an understanding of sorts, I might not have it rehabbed in time to build up for the run I want to do in April (and that's if it's actually on). Ever the optimist, my Plan (of course I have one) is to press gamely on with the standing-on-one-leg/rubber band thing and hope for the best.
3. Chips are evil. Especially when J is stress-eating.
4. Noddie's dance concert was last night. It was wonderful and adorable and now I want to learn to tap dance.
5. This Friday night everything in our house that stays still long enough will be covered in tinsel. It's going to be pretty and sparkly and Christmassy to look at instead of the messy half-packed disorganisation that is starting to mess with my head.
6. A bloke at my work, who is about my age, was really surprised that I recognised his Dead Kennedys t-shirt. I clearly need a de-frumping makeover. Why don't I look as though I have an interesting life? Or maybe surprising people is good?......I dunno
7. I really really do need to stop eating. It won't pack anything.
8. The reason all my Christmas presents are bought, wrapped and labelled already is not because I'm organised. It's because I'll do pretty much anything to avoid shopping in December. I forgot I was doing prayers at church last week (see? Not organised); while I was winging it in the pulpit I believe something resembling the phrase "if I'm bad in this life, I'll end up somewhere like Northland when I die" may have passed my lips.
9. I'm going to write our Christmas letter tonight, always good fun. S0 many exciting things have happened this year!
10. I FOUND MY ADDRESS BOOK!! It's been missing for weeks! It was in the passenger side door pocket of my car - I hardly ever sit there so it didn't occur to me to look. Yay!
11. Stupid vendors' stupid solicitor is taking FOREVER to get the stupid paperwork for the stupid new house organised, so it looks as though settlement won't be until FOREVER. Thank goodness for mince pies
12. I have a job interview for J's new shop next Monday. DON'T LAUGH. I'll be driving up and back (700km round trip) for the group interview. Nervous? Moi? Why can't they just give me the job? Whatever happened to nepotism?
13. If you don't like Christmas carols, don't get into my car. Ding dong merrily on high, people!
More anon, mince pie fans...........mmmmmmm.........mince pies..........
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Whine bleat sook
Meh. Meh. Meh.
That would be me the last few days, hence the lack of blogging as I am tryyyyyyyyyyying to not whine so much when I have so mcuh cool stuff going on and nothing of anysubstance to complain about. I mean
- Noddie's birthday party on Wednesday was...well it was.....just don't mention musical statues to me unless you've just handed me a LARGE glass of champagne. Noddie loved it and all the parents who came along still smile at me at school so it can't have been that bad. Noddie thought it was The Best Birthday Ever.
- J's farewell party on Sunday was good fun, and it was so nice to catch up with lots of friends we haven't seen all winter - although in hindsight a drop-in afternoon from 1-8pm was Just That Bit Too Long.
- J is enjoying his new job (of three days) very much, and it looks as though his team are both competent and easy to get on with
- his company will be paying for the moving truck! Score!
- Noddie is thrilled and excited to be going (a relief)
So why is all at chateau LBTEPA not hunky dory?
Ummmm.... as this is a mixed audience, I'll just say I've had a couple of things I've had to see the doctor about that have made life a little bit miserable. But they're being sorted out.
Every time I look at my house I see MOUNTAINS OF CRAP that I have to sort out/throw out/pack, while fending off their owners, Mr Hoarder or his dear daughter Miss But That's My Favourite!
Too much party-related eating and drinking (ok, ok, aka too little self-control/judgement), + too little training (being Out Of My Routine sheesh you'd think I was 18 months old + slightly unwell) = feeling blobby and slack and unsatisfied.
My hip's been playing up and my physio is off touring with the Bushrangers the inconsiderate b#$%&d so I had to find a new one - who is actually turning out really well; the exercises he's given me are not only extremly amusing to do, involving as they do rubber tubing and standing on one leg, but I can feel my "core" becoming more steely by the day.
And the guts of it....I don't have anything to look forward to. Now don't start - I know we're moving to the country and it will all be super and fab and idyllic etc etc
BUT
the vendors' solicitors are faffing around and we've had to extend the settlement and I won't be able to resign until it's all sorted and goodness knows when I'll be able to move away properly
and when I finally do get there I'll have to find a new hairdresser and doctor and physio and uni placements and FRIENDS and A JOB
and J has started his new job 300km away so I'm doing the single Mum thing during the week (= even fewer opportunities to work out) and Noddie is responding to Daddy's absence with a bit of (ahem) high maintenance behaviour
and I'm not racing my usual triathlon series this summer - it just doesn't fit in with J's job and the move, and as much as I wish it were so, my life isn't always All About Me - and I miss that focus - and that fun! - much more than I expected *sad face*
and I'm not even looking forward to my favourite swim very much because it'll be a half-arsed effort since I've hardly swum since April and also will be a Pain To Organise like every other bloody thing I want to do this summer
and the Big Race I want to do next year might not be on because of stupid legal battles over the ownership
AND I know these are small temporary things and nothing REAL to complain about
HOWEVER
It's my blog and I'll BLEAT IF I WANT TO
Now off to enter that damn swim and then stand on one leg for a while.
More anon, pressers-on!
That would be me the last few days, hence the lack of blogging as I am tryyyyyyyyyyying to not whine so much when I have so mcuh cool stuff going on and nothing of anysubstance to complain about. I mean
- Noddie's birthday party on Wednesday was...well it was.....just don't mention musical statues to me unless you've just handed me a LARGE glass of champagne. Noddie loved it and all the parents who came along still smile at me at school so it can't have been that bad. Noddie thought it was The Best Birthday Ever.
- J's farewell party on Sunday was good fun, and it was so nice to catch up with lots of friends we haven't seen all winter - although in hindsight a drop-in afternoon from 1-8pm was Just That Bit Too Long.
- J is enjoying his new job (of three days) very much, and it looks as though his team are both competent and easy to get on with
- his company will be paying for the moving truck! Score!
- Noddie is thrilled and excited to be going (a relief)
So why is all at chateau LBTEPA not hunky dory?
Ummmm.... as this is a mixed audience, I'll just say I've had a couple of things I've had to see the doctor about that have made life a little bit miserable. But they're being sorted out.
Every time I look at my house I see MOUNTAINS OF CRAP that I have to sort out/throw out/pack, while fending off their owners, Mr Hoarder or his dear daughter Miss But That's My Favourite!
Too much party-related eating and drinking (ok, ok, aka too little self-control/judgement), + too little training (being Out Of My Routine sheesh you'd think I was 18 months old + slightly unwell) = feeling blobby and slack and unsatisfied.
My hip's been playing up and my physio is off touring with the Bushrangers the inconsiderate b#$%&d so I had to find a new one - who is actually turning out really well; the exercises he's given me are not only extremly amusing to do, involving as they do rubber tubing and standing on one leg, but I can feel my "core" becoming more steely by the day.
And the guts of it....I don't have anything to look forward to. Now don't start - I know we're moving to the country and it will all be super and fab and idyllic etc etc
BUT
the vendors' solicitors are faffing around and we've had to extend the settlement and I won't be able to resign until it's all sorted and goodness knows when I'll be able to move away properly
and when I finally do get there I'll have to find a new hairdresser and doctor and physio and uni placements and FRIENDS and A JOB
and J has started his new job 300km away so I'm doing the single Mum thing during the week (= even fewer opportunities to work out) and Noddie is responding to Daddy's absence with a bit of (ahem) high maintenance behaviour
and I'm not racing my usual triathlon series this summer - it just doesn't fit in with J's job and the move, and as much as I wish it were so, my life isn't always All About Me - and I miss that focus - and that fun! - much more than I expected *sad face*
and I'm not even looking forward to my favourite swim very much because it'll be a half-arsed effort since I've hardly swum since April and also will be a Pain To Organise like every other bloody thing I want to do this summer
and the Big Race I want to do next year might not be on because of stupid legal battles over the ownership
AND I know these are small temporary things and nothing REAL to complain about
HOWEVER
It's my blog and I'll BLEAT IF I WANT TO
Now off to enter that damn swim and then stand on one leg for a while.
More anon, pressers-on!Friday, November 20, 2009
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Six
What adventures you've had, Noddie - and so many more to come now you're six! 
Daddy and I are so happy you're becoming such a kind, funny, loving girl.
Happy birthday little mate!
Saturday, November 14, 2009
I know how
Right.
The last four weeks, amigos, they have been the biggest scoff-and-slackfest seen in LBTEPAville since the great eat-a-thon and laze-o-rama of 2003 (aka gestatingly awaiting the arrival of the Noddmeister). There's been a lot of movement, I grant you - we are moving to the country, as I may have mentioned. In addition, my waist is moving out, my weight is moving up and my behind is heading south. This is Not Good.
But Enough Is Enough. So Far and No Further.
If I may be fanciful, the easy life is a bit like The Borg. Little by little you let things slide. A missed workout, an extra helping, a nasty comment when holding your tongue would have solved a problem. Listening to your own excuses for not being who you want to be. Before you know it you've been assimilated into the the slack, soft thoughtless life, and you don't recognise yourself any more.
This might seem an extreme response to a few very eventful weeks where I've actually exercised a fair bit, but this is my blog and I'll be as histrionic as I want to. I read a blog post once where a severely obese woman was listening to a friend grizzle about gaining five pounds, and she thought, five pounds? You're worrying about five pounds? And then she thought, what if I'd done something when I first gained five pounds? It was a good post, I wish I'd kept the link. The main point of it was that there has to be a point where you stop, look around you and say, no more. You have to Draw A Line.
Now the Plan Is This.
(of course the Plan includes charts and stickers and complaining and stuff ups and why am I bothering?s, but that's the day-to-day stuff). This is the guts of it. This is The Line.
I am LBTEPA and this is what I do.
I exercise almost every day.
I drink lots of water and eat lots of fruit and veges.
I seldom eat junk food.
I don't eat chips or chocolate (don't gasp in horror, I'm not actually all that mad on chocolate. And it's mince pie season soon.)
I feel uncomfortable as I break old habits.
I get tired.
I do things that are not always convenient.
I am patient.
I set high standards for myself.
I am LBTEPA and this is who I am.
Now, you're saying to yourself, ewwwwww. That doesn't sound like fun AT ALL. How long can she keep it up?
Getting back on to the straight and narrow always sucks. Oh yes, it does. But I've been here before. I know how to do this. I know the slog will be worth it. Uncomfortable and tired and sore and impatient will last for maybe three weeks. I can hack it for that long, becuase I know what comes after that - I'll feel really good again! I'll be on a roll again! And I know how that feels. Bring. It. On.
More anon, wave riders!
The last four weeks, amigos, they have been the biggest scoff-and-slackfest seen in LBTEPAville since the great eat-a-thon and laze-o-rama of 2003 (aka gestatingly awaiting the arrival of the Noddmeister). There's been a lot of movement, I grant you - we are moving to the country, as I may have mentioned. In addition, my waist is moving out, my weight is moving up and my behind is heading south. This is Not Good.
But Enough Is Enough. So Far and No Further.
If I may be fanciful, the easy life is a bit like The Borg. Little by little you let things slide. A missed workout, an extra helping, a nasty comment when holding your tongue would have solved a problem. Listening to your own excuses for not being who you want to be. Before you know it you've been assimilated into the the slack, soft thoughtless life, and you don't recognise yourself any more.
This might seem an extreme response to a few very eventful weeks where I've actually exercised a fair bit, but this is my blog and I'll be as histrionic as I want to. I read a blog post once where a severely obese woman was listening to a friend grizzle about gaining five pounds, and she thought, five pounds? You're worrying about five pounds? And then she thought, what if I'd done something when I first gained five pounds? It was a good post, I wish I'd kept the link. The main point of it was that there has to be a point where you stop, look around you and say, no more. You have to Draw A Line.
Now the Plan Is This.
(of course the Plan includes charts and stickers and complaining and stuff ups and why am I bothering?s, but that's the day-to-day stuff). This is the guts of it. This is The Line.
I am LBTEPA and this is what I do.
I exercise almost every day.
I drink lots of water and eat lots of fruit and veges.
I seldom eat junk food.
I don't eat chips or chocolate (don't gasp in horror, I'm not actually all that mad on chocolate. And it's mince pie season soon.)
I feel uncomfortable as I break old habits.
I get tired.
I do things that are not always convenient.
I am patient.
I set high standards for myself.
I am LBTEPA and this is who I am.
Now, you're saying to yourself, ewwwwww. That doesn't sound like fun AT ALL. How long can she keep it up?
Getting back on to the straight and narrow always sucks. Oh yes, it does. But I've been here before. I know how to do this. I know the slog will be worth it. Uncomfortable and tired and sore and impatient will last for maybe three weeks. I can hack it for that long, becuase I know what comes after that - I'll feel really good again! I'll be on a roll again! And I know how that feels. Bring. It. On.
More anon, wave riders!
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Monday, November 09, 2009
haven't seen you for ages
I'm feeling a bit bamboozled and overwhelmed (but in a sort-of good way) at everything that's happened since the first of October
- J noticed an internal ad for a new store in area we've wanted to live in for years, applied for the job and got it
- I handed in 8,000 words of uni assignments, due on the same day, four days after my first marathon
- we organised finance for the new house
- I sat my last exam for the year
- and cleverly gained 2kg through sloth and over-indulgence
We had a pretty big weekend too.......
- drove 300km to 'our new town'
- inspected 3 houses
- listened incredulously to astonishingly racist comment by second estate agent. Rang agency owner. Spoke strongly. Received apology
- looked at 6 more houses with other agents
- we bought a house! Right size, right area, right $$$. Thank you SO MUCH to the INCREDIBLY messy incumbent tenants for disguising the house's excellentness!
So when are you coming to stay?
- we ate fish and chips on the jetty and laughed and sang all the way back to Gran's house!
On Monday we enrolled Noddie at a nice school less than 1km from the new house
- then picnicked with Gran at a park with an awesome worm slide
- and drove 300km home again
I've realised I'm going to have to clean our oven before we can rent out our house. Nooooooooooooooooo!
- J noticed an internal ad for a new store in area we've wanted to live in for years, applied for the job and got it
- I handed in 8,000 words of uni assignments, due on the same day, four days after my first marathon
- we organised finance for the new house
- I sat my last exam for the year
- and cleverly gained 2kg through sloth and over-indulgence
We had a pretty big weekend too.......
- drove 300km to 'our new town'
- inspected 3 houses
- listened incredulously to astonishingly racist comment by second estate agent. Rang agency owner. Spoke strongly. Received apology
- looked at 6 more houses with other agents
- we bought a house! Right size, right area, right $$$. Thank you SO MUCH to the INCREDIBLY messy incumbent tenants for disguising the house's excellentness!
So when are you coming to stay?
- we ate fish and chips on the jetty and laughed and sang all the way back to Gran's house!On Monday we enrolled Noddie at a nice school less than 1km from the new house
- then picnicked with Gran at a park with an awesome worm slide
- and drove 300km home again
I've realised I'm going to have to clean our oven before we can rent out our house. Nooooooooooooooooo!
I think I might spend the next couple of days just doing nothing much while it all sinks in.
More anon, day-seizers!
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