Then I went to Melbourne to see the surgeon and get the plaster off and get a 'boot' fitted'. I'm doing everything as per instructions, of course, but struggling a bit emotionally becuase I want to be All Better Right Now and strangely enough that's not happening. Very odd.
I have a much longer post to write about What The Surgeon Said (not very reassuring) and My Plucky Response (in short: **** you, sport, just watch me) but it's 11.30pm and I've been putting off going to bed becuase these boot/weight-bearing shenanigans have been quite a lot more painful than I expected and I'm hoping that stronger drugs+ really tired might get me a longer stretch in the land of nod. I'm perfectly ok but not terribly cheery.
I do think that you, my five faithful readers, will be proud of my current Plan. As has already been demonstrated, responses from acquaintances with regard to my hoppiness have not been uniformly supportive (and my word there has been some gold medal tactlessness since I came back to work on crutches, you wouldn't believe it). That's indubitably their stuff, but in my state of weary, worried sookiness I'm not up to dealing with it. I have developed a set of responses to the most common
1. I broke my ankle last year and it didn't heal properly so I had to have a bit of surgery
2. I. Was. Buying. Prawns. Yes. Buying prawns. No. Not running. There's a certain type of rather fixed smile I use with this one that is quite effective in getting people to STFU
3. It's a bit sore sometimes but not too bad.
4. Metamucil and plenty of water is doing the trick. I kid you not, I have been asked about this more than once
5. It's too early to tell yet, we'll see when the boot comes off. I hope so though.
6. Don't be an arse, it doesn't suit you. It is absolutely essential to smile pleasantly and refrain from striking the person when using this
I want this t-shirt
More anon, slumber-seekers!
8 comments:
LOL! I love your pre-planned responses.
Chin up!!
Deep breath, my friend! Life is just saying there's more for you to see at this rest stop before forging ahead again. Enjoy the downtime; the road will still be there :)
I completely concur that injury (or, I would imagine, post-surgery) is complete Sucksville, and I hope you're on the way out of there soon. I'm currently sulking (in extremis) because my physio just dropped the word "months" into her prognosis of when my back will stop hurting, and I was thinking more like weeks. Inactivity doesn't suit me. Neither does sulking. Le sigh. Here's to us both getting better and out running / biking / having fun again soon!
Why are people such tactless morons? I'm sick to death of explaining that no, I did NOT injure my shoulder and elbow whilst lifting heavy shit, doing pushups at the park or riding my bike; they are in fact overuse injuries, caused by my sedentary JOB.
My polite smile becomes even more fixed at the frequent use of "Oh, once you turn fifty, everything just falls apart". I clench my teeth together to prevent myself blurting out: "No, that's just YOUR excuse, you pathetic, lazy so-and-so!"
I do have a similar set of responses, but I'm borrowing your #6 and from now on, will be trotting that one out as my #1. Over it!
After almost three years, I'm finally at a point where the pain is mostly gone and I'm seriously upping the training ante once again. It seemed hopeless for a while there, but I never really gave up.
Maintain the positive thoughts as best you can - you'll get there.
Surgeons can be pricks. It has nothing to do with you.
I think the word fuck is very useful in this type of situation.
Fuck that surgeon
Fuck anyone who gives you a hard time, it's their fucking problem, the fuckers.
You don't give a fuck
And you fucking well will do another fucking marathon.
and another FUCK for good measure.
cilla xx
oh and PS as a geriatrician I recommend movicol for constipation. Metamucil alone may just bloat you.
I suggest
7. What the fuck's your fucking problem?
and
8. (As a wise woman once suggested to me) What sort of person says something like that?
9. (From Heathers) How very.
10. (From Miss Manners) Indeed.
Emma
who readily admits, in your situation, I'd be giving 7 a good workout.
I'm not sure I've ever commented on your site, but I just wanted to say that I love your reappearing phrase "my five faithful readers"!
Also, I have been enduring pain due to a torn meniscus since February 2012. How did that happen, somehow getting up after a two hour meeting! No idea really how. Surgery helped a bit, but I'm still so much less mobile, it pisses me off. So, I wholeheartedly applaud your enthusiasm and try to feel inspired to hope for more ease of movement.
Great post - I also love your standard replies. I too feel frustrated with people's interest about why I'm still limping!
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