Pleased, Happy or Thrilled?

So:
4 more sleeps until my "A race" - coo er gosh doesn't that sound all serious and keen? But this has been my focus for several months now, and it will be the best prepared I've ever been for a half certainly compared to the last one ahem hem with five runs over 16km on the tally.
Now all the big kids have A, B and C goals, so if I'm to maintain the ruse that I am Serious About This then I'd better get some too. However, I will eschew alphabetical classifications and use Pleased, Happy and Thrilled.
Pleased: finish strongly and have fun.
Happy: 2:30- 2:35 (my PB is 2:30)
Thrilled: anything under 2:30.
Wishy-washy? Perhaps. I just don't know what to expect so I'm setting it up to be failure-proof.

It's all been a bit mad here this week as J and Noddie slowly come good from the gastro and I try and look after them, keep up with the washing, start to pack and clean the house since we leave at 6am on Saturday, and do my last taper runs. Oh, and go to work. Things have been so topsy-turvy that I hit the 5kg-of-lard-off mark this morning *does happy dance* and I almost forgot to be thrilled about it! Being a bit flustered has had one benefit - I've also had no time to panic about this. In seven weeks. Eek.

3 more sleeps and we'll be somewhere it's not cold and raining horizontally.....
More anon, loungers-by-the-pool!

House of plague

The Spousal Unit and Noddie have both had viral gastroenteritis (or so the doctor described it) all weekend. J was so sick he asked me to drive him to the doctor on Sunday morning.
Things I am glad about:
- I haven't caught it (fingers crossed, please!)
- the 24-hour clinic 2km from our place
- whatever the doctor gave J, because it worked.
- our washing machine and dryer (I know, I'm sorry, I'm sorry! We were running out of sheets and it's been freezing and drizzly)
- Gatorade, because J can keep it down
- they're much better today
- five more sleeps until we leave for Queensland. Six sleeps until the Gold Coast half and Noddie's interstate racing debut

more anon, Florence Nightingales!

Not a Run Melbourne race report

I often get comments about getting up early, training out in the weather all the time, how I must be so 'disciplined', 'dedicated' etc. etc (ahem, LOL ROFL). As you know, this is far from the case. When I was little my Mum used to play us a bedtime story tape of Peter Rabbit. Peter sang a little song about why he got into such mischief. It pretty much explains everything, and goes like this:

Why do I do it?
What is the cure?
My brothers and my sisters find it easy I am sure
That's how I've been ever since I begun
Why do I do it?
Why do I do it?
Why DO I do it?

BECAUSE

IT'S

FUN!

Happy anniversary

June 22nd 2007 June 22nd 2008

Running a hilly half marathon in the rain was undoubtedly a stupid idea* given that the doctor told me to stay in bed until tomorrow, but I was happy with my time (if not my heart rate), considering. I wanted to celebrate being on two strong legs, and I did.
I plan to spend tomorrow glued to the live feed from Ironman Coeur d'Alene, where my blogger mates Misty, Brian, Tea and SWTG are dreaming big and going hard.

More anon, happy people!
*VERY, VERY STUPID. DO NOT DO THIS. DAIS, NAID (Do As I Say, Not As I Do) *cough cough*

It could have worked - renamed NO, YOU DUFFER, IT COULDN'T

When Lurgi Attack (top name for a movie, no?) here at chateau LBTEPA, the normal procedure is thus:
1. strike dramatic pose, complain frequently and loudly;
2. Rest Rest Rest (always secretly convinced that I will certainly lose every skerrick of hard-earned fitness and gain at least 11kg in four or five days);
3. Get better, start training again (see 1.)
This time I thought, well, why not be all TTHU* and maintain a reduced exercise program, of course monitoring frequently for Bad Things such as those weird hot and cold sweats or trouble getting a full breath.
This seemed Like a Good Idea At The Time because
1. It amuses me to pretend to be all gritty and hardcore;
2. I've read in lots of places that 'above the neck is ok' (although reading back over that, it sounds like what I'll tell Noddie before her first date WHEN SHE IS 28), and this was just a HEAD cold;
*UPDATE: My doctor tells me this is a MAJOR furphy. Sick = sick. Rest = rest. LBTEPA = STUPID.
3. No pesky head cold is going to stop me having fun;
4. No Bad Things were happening.........
until yesterday, when my short slow swim told me loud and clear that I lost the toss BIG time. Maaate.... it wasn't exactly unpleasant (especially after I hit the codral). I just couldn't move. Or think. Oh well. I've crawled out of bed today to email my boss, J is taking me to the doctor for some horse pills later, and these tiresome aches and razor throat will disappear by Sunday. They will. Even if they don't, it's time to start tapering for the Gold Coast so I was going to rest more this week anyway. So there.
It could have worked.
UPDATE 1: (smacks self on head) NO, IT COULDN'T, YOU NONG!. Oh well. Live and learn. Take your antibiotics. Sleep.
UPDATE 2: The wonderful Spousal Unit interrupted my moaning about being too stupid to realise I had an acute infection to say he thought I'd have got sick anyway and I probably hadn't made myself worse by soldiering on. He's so nice.

More anon, never-say-die people!
*Toughen The Heck Up. I'm in a genteel phase

S and M on the freeway

S(ara) and M(inerva) and I had the Best Day Ever riding along the freeway yesterday morning. I didn't take my camera; these photos are from the paper .Hard to imagine, but it was even more fun than it looks!
Highlights of the day
- waking up at 3.30am with a rotten headache from my #$%&! headcold, hopping online while the drugs kicked in, reading Nancy's post and remembering I needed my number and chip!!!!
- sleeping in, being horribly late and the wonderful Sara saying she'd wait for me
- parking in an illegal spot, realising it, joining the enormous slow queue of other confused sad late people, and then getting a super park only 1km from the start.
- finding Sara easily among the 26,000 other cyclists
- zoooooooooooming along the smoothest road I've ever been on
- a funny, positive thoughtful friend to pedal along, puff up hills and generally share the day with (((HUGS))) to you Sara!
- my arm warmers and gloves - so soft! so light! so warm!
- the quirky sculptures
- calling 'beeep' to each other and giggling as we rode under the toll points
- lowering my seat 3mm = no hip soreness at all
- getting mixed up with the 'family ride' - it was like riding through a chook pen, so funny!
- also very funny - a small girl yelling look Mummy, one of the really fast riders! as I passed
- the grease I got on my new red windcheater when I was getting Minerva out of the car aarrgghh!!! Nooooooooo!! came off easily in the wash
- a glorious nanna nap zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Other news

My friend is going much better and thanks you all very much for your kind thoughts and prayers ((hugs)) you are all the BEST ((mwah!!))
Other news: I'm very very pleased to report that Team LBTEPA seems to be getting on much better since the Family Meeting.
The 65km freeway ride is this Sunday, and if this weather keeps up I should drown or freeze to death before I fall off from exhaustion. As is my wont, I have resorted to the 'throw money at it' solution and invested in arm-warmers and some winter gloves.
I have now lost 4.5 whole kgs this year - what a speedster, eh? - and can write a thrilling new 'Xkg-1' number on the fridge and the stove splashback, woot! This is the lightest I've been in seven years.
Noddie's latest disgusting lurgi has attacked and is incommoding me somewhat, but echinacea and ibuprofen are keeping it at bay and me on the road and in the pool. Never surrender!
My new windcheater arrived startlingly quickly, no doubt because of the astonishing postage charges. I am utterly in love with it - so soft! so red! such a cool design! - and want to wear it All The Time.
Our new lounge suite will be here in about an hour. It's a La-Z-Boy with those footrest thingos so J thinks he's died and gone to heaven. He's actually sweeping the living room right now, so maybe I've died and gone to heaven!

More anon, rocker-recliners!

Perspective

I just got some news that put all my petty tribulations and triumphs into perspective. My friend who was admitted to the psych ward for excessive anxiety about her baby's development has finally got to see a consultant paediatric neurologist ie someone who actually knows what he's talking about and has been told that her 4-month old actually does have brain damage because of the medication she (my friend) was prescribed to help with breastfeeding. Which is banned in the U.S. because it's known to cause brain damage.
F#$%ing breast-feeding Nazis and their rotten stinking breastfeed-at-all-costs propaganda. F#$%ing judgemental no-kids know-nothing psychiatrist. F#$%ing dismisstive paediatricians and maternal health nurses. Bastards.
I don't know how she can stand it. How could anyone stand it? I just don't know.
Please send her your prayers.

More anon

Snakes and ladders

I did 19km yesterday in 2hrs 30 minutes - don't laugh, this is a good non-race run for me! - with no soreness at all afterward. It's either the chi-running technique or the protein shakes after a long workout or both, but I'll be starting the Gold Coast half mara with the most consistent preparation I've ever managed.
Noddie's hobbies du jour include arguing, shouting, contradicting, being rude and disobedient, giving cheek and generally sending Mummy completely mental. This morning after yet another incessant argument-fest, I dropped the ball entirely and just started crying and couldn't stop. This was in lieu of shaking her until her teeth rattled, so it was for the best, although I wish my nose didn't spread across my face when I get the sooks cause everyone at work kept asking me what was wrong. Note to self: write rude letter to Avon about their 'waterproof' mascara, ha!
I racked my brains all day about how we could change the trajectory of this behaviour. All I could think of was a Family Meeting (we've never had such a thing before, but I was desperate) where we started by saying 3 things we liked about the other two, then we each got to set Limits for the other two. They have 'Limits' at kinder, and Noddie loves kinder so much I'm willing to ride that sleigh until it crashes into the gates of Hades. My limits are not be so cross and not shout so much, and Noddie's are to wear what Mummy gives her without arguing, except on Fridays and Saturdays when she can choose whatever she likes, and to either eat her breakfast or to explain politely that she's not hungry. J has some Limits too, but a wifely loyalty forbids me throwing the harsh light of public opinion on them.
Speaking of trajectories, I have radically changed a habit which has been worrying me for some time. For the last five weeks I have restricted my wine drinking to one glass - or fewer! - per day, 5 days a week. I didn't say anything because people can be a bit judgemental about drinking and also ok ok I admit it I was a bit ashamed that it had got this far, and a bit afraid I wouldn't be able to do it. But I made myself a little chart, and nicked some of Noddie's good behaviour stickers, and I did it!
I will soon be wearing this to remind myself that I can - and I do - make positive changes. It's not all whingeing and showing off!
The best news of all that I got today is that my dear friend M does not have lupus. It's a good day.
More anon, my friends

Welcome

Riding 40km along a new bike path in the fog that never burned off even at midday: a cold cold adventure.
Running in the dark foggy morning: freezing, but spookily fun!
Running out of petrol on the way to work, blocking the Hoddle St on ramp, being pushed to a safe place by a kind cyclist and then rescued by the Spousal Unit: an embarrassing pain in the a%se.

Hearing that your new baby nephew has arrived safe and sound: priceless! Driving a 300km round trip after work to see him, my brother and sister-in-law and introduce Noddie to her new cousin: absolutely worth it.
Welcome to our family, little Zach.

Ten minutes more

Off to face the Fear of Long Runs again (but it's a step-back week, yay!) after this so will keep it to a ten-minute 'splat' - I apologise in advance for all the lazy-arse dashes - yes I do!
Thanks for all the good wishes and prayers about my friend - she is improving little by little and has been allowed home for the weekend which is a good sign.
It was one of those stupid weekends where the best plans were thrown awry and a lovely sleep-in turned into a missed run b/c of lack of organisation by people other than myself, so I had to wrench my mind away from the 'failure' and back to the fact that May was my second-highest and most- consistent training month for the year. The fabulous Jeanne has been good enough to send on her tri-club swim workouts so lunchtime plods-up-and-down have turned into fun fun fun speedy(ish) playtimes.
On Saturday Noddie and I went to the airport and saw Mum and my sister off on their Big Trip - a month in the U.K! So exciting!

My beloved Doggies handed the undefeated Hawks a trouncing, causing me to dance and sing about the living room in an immoderate fashion and make Noddie laugh and laugh.
J and I went to an engagement party full of 20-somethings - why do they all wear so much black, I wonder?
(the following conversation became even funnier when it was repeated almost verbatim several times).
LBTEPA to 20-something uni friend: so good to see you - we'll have to catch up more often. Can I message you on Facebook? 20-S u f (very startled): Are you on Facebook?!?!!?
LBTEPA: darl, my parents both have Facebook pages
20-S u f (creaking sound of shifting world-view): Oh.......
Confirmed my social ineptitude by dashing from church to a blogger meetup, arriving half an hour late, finding no-one, apologising on facebook then finding out I was 3 weeks early. Please pass me the paper bag mask that none may recognise me.
The thing I love most about my kid is that a day spent arguing over everything and fighting with me about everything and generally driving me insane can end with an exciting adventure walk (aka what the f$%& else can I do to pass the time before J gets home ?) down by the creek in the foggy dark - with gloves and hats and torches!!! Cool!! - and all is well again.
That's 20 minutes....must be off - I'm wearing my "Warning: training with hangover" shirt and it's not even the slightest bit accurate and after the weekend I had that's an achievement too :)

More anon, celebrators of small victories!

Speed Blogging

I have 10 minutes before I have to jump in the shower and then go and fetch Noddie from kinder, then frantically do a faux-tidy of the house before a friend from church comes around to look at our paint as she has to choose colours for her house by Friday and our house has a lot of different colours, so this will be slapped down in a hurry.
- a friend of mine is in a mother-baby acute psychiatric ward with her 3 month old baby. Poor darling, please send her your prayers if you do that sort of thing.
- faced my Fear Of Long Runs again - why do I dread them and procrastinate so? same with my bike rides, which I LOVE? - and had quite a good one. This will be the best prepared I have ever been for a half-marathon I think. Not to say I will be particularly fast (hahahahaha ROFL) just well-prepared. I've entered the Run Melbourne half marathon on June 22nd as an untapered last long run before the Gold Coast. Should be a hoot and there's bling involved......
- sleep has been a bit broken as Noddie conquers the last toileting milestone - waking up and going to the loo! Hurrah for Noddie, and please pass the eye cream for the suitcases under my eyes.
- J and I walked up to the primary school and enrolled Noddie for next year!! Our baby is going to school!
- it has occurred to me that as a heavyish 41 year old with prior injuries, my major goal this winter should be to remain injury- free. Well, hi there Captain Obvious!! In which case I should REALLY not try and build both my run base and my bike base simultaneously (Hi again C.A! You're doing a great job!). Just because the mighty Sara is cranking out the kms doesn't mean I have to. She'll just have to wait for me at the finish, and I bet she does too, she's a kind person. The best thing about this realisation is that I had it before I injured myself. Maybe I am growing up... nah
- Don't laugh, Eat 'Em - I am thrilled to be about to crack 100km of running this month. My best total ever!
- my new bike seat and the words 'anterior pelvic tilt' are currently my favourite things in the whole world. So sue me. I'm fickle.
Sh*t, ten minutes already. Must dash as I am scared of Noddie's kinder teacher glaring at me for being late. I think she plays netball.

More anon, kind readers of hasty gibberish!

Magic

My run last night was magic. I couldn’t go in the morning because the Spousal Unit left for work at 5.40a.m. and not even Keen Virtuous LBTEPA is home from exercise that early. I was pretty tired after work, it was cold and dark, Noddie was in full arsenic hour swing and I was expecting a get-the-bastard-done slog. Off I trotted. I’ve been reading about chi running and practising tucking my pelvis under and lifting my feet, which felt terribly awkward at first but I think I'm getting the hang of it. It's hard to explain; you'll have to read the book yourself.
Anyway - last night was one of the magic ones. It felt as though all the slogs and trudges and plain simple Time On The Road had led to this one moment. I was floating. It was effortless. My feet were barely touching the ground. The stars were out, and when I came over the hill next to the primary school there was such a moon as I’ve never seen – huge and bright and ochre with vivid blood-red streaks. On and on I floated in the timeless night – and then on the last downhill Josh Groban sang You Raise Me Up and I was thinking about God and J and Noddie and all my friends and I was so happy I almost had tears in my eyes.

Off to graduation this afternoon. Noddie is already wildly excited because I took her with me to uni during the week to check out where the hall is. I have decided that fishnet tights and red heels are appropriate graduation attire (the brochure was quite stern on that point) and I am determined to not be disappointed when J doesn't give me a naff graduation bear. We are taking the in-laws to the ceremony and then out to dinner as a thankyou for all their help; my mum will be there as a buffer and there's always champagne too of course.

More anon, celebrators of life's milestones!

UPDATE: J, I have wronged you and I apologise. Thankyou for indulging me. Mwah!

Just a week

It's been a week of stuff, just stuff - cancelled meetings on the other side of the city, strange shifts for J, everyone a bit run-down from the latest lurgi Noddie has brought home...just stuff.
But then again
J lost his WORK KEYS on Sunday (security and alarm keys for a huge hardware store) and although I was pretty dark that the rare free afternoon earmarked for knitting and movie-watching was spent looking under fridges and shaking out couch cushions, I FOUND THEM!!! WOOT! - FYI if you put a pile of folded washing on top of keys, it is possible that the key tag can hook into a sock so what when you lift up the washing the keys appear not to be there and you don't find them until you give up looking and say f#$% it, I might as well put the washing away.
We had to get a photo of Sally-the-pup printed for Noddie to take to kinder and I LOST THE CAMERA MEMORY CARD. Ackkk! Words cannot express the confusion of feelings - oh no! why am I so stupid? It's not fair! I found J's lost stuff and now mine is gone for good! Then at 3 o'clock next morning I woke up and thought I wore black boots and a pink coat to church - why did I look in my red handbag? I bet it's in my black handbag! And it was! Huzzah!
And yesterday I had the slowest most crap ride ever but the full moon was so bright and the sunrise was so pretty it almost made up for it, and this morning Sally hadn't left any messes for me to clean up.
I'm graduating on Friday. I wasn't going to, but I think it's important to punctuate life milestones, and to show Noddie what this Mummy-going-to-uni bizzo is about. Any excuse to robe up and then go out to dinner, really!

LBTEPA - 1 , sloth - 0

*looks around, startled that it's Saturday already*
Yesterday morning Slothful LBTEPA woke up at 5.20 and had this conversation with herself
- I think it's raining, it's a bit dangerous to ride in the dark and the rain
- zzzzz
- it's 5.40...is it raining? Oh it's not raining. I thought it was raining...five more minutes...
- s#$%! It's 6.01! Dammit I haven't got time to do my full circuit now...oh well, I have had a rotten headcold this week, the rest will do me good.
(Keen Virtuous LBTEPA, silent until now) - What? I can't believe this! GET. THE. F#$% UP. Since when do we miss an entire session becuase we haven't got time to do it all? You la-la!
SL - (whines)
KVL - I tell you what, if we ride for 10min and can't keep our heart rate down then we'll go home.
SL - (grumpy) oh, all right. Bloody nag.
Half an hour later
KVL - (zooming along the freewaybike path in the rushing wind, watching the sunrise) Wheeeee! This is SO MUCH FUN!
SL - I suppose you're going to remember this for next time, are you? (mutters)
KVL - Yep
I don't know whether heart rate monitors are the Best Thing Ever or Pitiless Sweepers Aside of Feeble Excuses. I've had a yucky headcold this week so I decided I'd have a crack at all my sessions and then abandon them if I couldn't keep my heart rate down - and lo and behold, my head can be stuffed with kapok and my nose running like a tap and nothing bad happens when I run or ride. Good news, huh? Hmmmm......

In other extremely fun news, Sara-of-the-Top-Secret-blog (she'd tell you but she'd have to kill you) invited me to do this! What could be more cool than riding along a brand spanking new freeway before the cars get a turn?
Mind you, when I said this to the Spousal Unit he gave me such a funny look....
In closing I would like to wish my friend Wes all the very best for a great day at his first Half-Ironman! Go Wes go!

More anon, enjoyers of rainy weekends

Ups and downs

Good things that happened this weekend:

Our new puppy Sally

The wonderful atmosphere at the Mother's Day run.
A pretty good time (56.20-ish for 8km).

Sharing the day with J and Noddie.
Catching up with my brother and sister.

Bad things that happened this weekend:
A huge, horrid, MASSIVE row with J lasting more than seventeen hours, that included - but was by no means limited to - cold and fatigue, people we don't know very well, priorities, a stubby holder, thoughtfulness, moccasins, TV and Noddie's pants.
Far too much pizza and bubbles.

More anon, kayakers over the rapids of life!

Saturday

Whew.
That was a busy week for me - training and site visits meant I had to work four days instead of three, and was in the office for a total of two hours. Now the Spousal Unit has taken Noddie to her swimming lessons and to get me a fabulous Mothers' Day present (or he will if he knows what's good for him), and one for his mother too. I was going to say, not so important, but just because I can't stand the woman doesn't mean she should miss out.
The house is quiet, my tea is steaming gently and my saved-up-for-the weekend dark rye toast is crunchy and good.
My mum is coming down on the train this arvo so we have to clean the bathroom, vacuum, and attempt to conceal the normal squalor in the study coz it's also the guest room. Tomorrow will be a huge day - not only are we running in the morning and having the family (including M-I-L, don't say I don't put in) over for dinner, but I am determined to finally present my dear mama with the four mothers' day cards which I have bought over the years and completely failed to either post or hand deliver.
Prior to all that - in about twenty minutes, as soon as I stop faffing around on the computer - I will be finding out whether this is my new best friend.A chick bike seat! Following the example of the invincible GGtI, I have invested in some kindness to my ladyparts. Will this be the answer? We shall see.

More anon, arrangers of excellent presents for your mothers!
No need to thank me. I'm here to help.

Happy Mothers' Day

This is a bit early, but I will be flat stick busy for the rest of the week and probably won't have time to post before Sunday.

MOTHER'S DAY 2003-2008.
5 years ago I was throwing up around the clock and fearing I would miscarry.
4 years ago I 'ran' 4km in 38 minutes, 4 minutes slower than my Mum!Three years ago it was such a beautiful day I did the 8 km instead of the 4km and had such a good time I ended up finishing my first half-marathon later that year.Two years ago it poured with rain, I ran on my own and no-one took any photos. It was still a great day.
Last year I was so proud to be sharing the day with Mum and Noddie that I ignored my sore ankle.

Last June I thought I wouldn't be racing again until now.This year we will be running together again. You're the best, Mum.

HAPPY MOTHERS' DAY TO MY WONDERFUL MUM, AND TO ALL THE MUMS READING THIS.

IMPORTANT PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: If you have a Mum, or the woman you love is a Mum, go and organise an EXCELLENT present STRAIGHT AWAY.

All the cool kids have one

A heart rate monitor! I am slowly but inexorably being sucked into the vortex of training toys. I blame Wes and Misty. I'm sure it will make all the difference once I work out how to make it stop telling me I'm dead.

UPDATE: OMG I am TURTLEY in love with this thing! How fun is it to know that you ARE working hard enough - but not too hard? So much information! So much beeping!UPDATE: Yesterday I finally got around to installing the bike computer I got for my birthday (clearly I was temporarily possessed by the spirit of some mechanically-capable person).
WHERE WILL IT ALL END?

ORN*: 15m

That’s minutes. Oh well. Little by little. Thursday I’ll do 30 min and then on Saturday the prescription is an hour.
Following the lead of the mighty GGtI in not being All Complaining All the Time (not that there’s anything wrong with that), here’s my list of 10 things that made this week a good one.
1. Noddie is totally the best in her swimming class – after 3 weeks, vindicating my decision to delay sending her until she was old enough to have appropriate motor co-ordination and social skills. Proud Mummy/bang my head moment: we go to the pool nearly every week, and nearly every week Noddie wants to float on her back - with her chin tucked right down on her chest. So nearly every week I suggest she might like to point her chin up at the ceiling – and nearly every week she bellows “NO!” in her implacably contrary way. In swimming class she is the only one who points her chin at the ceiling.
2. Damn but I like riding my bike! Last night I went out – coz my back is much better and the physio said I could! - and it was wild and woolly, and windy, and the rain spattering on my jacket made a cool sound, and my yellow glasses made everything look spectacularly eerie - and when I got home the heater was on and Noddie was teaching the Spousal Unit how to play the triangle.
3. I have quite a bit to do at work. This is good. Trust me, there are few things more soul-sapping than feeling pointless.
4. We are all completely in love with the dinosaur fairy lights that J brought home for Noddie’s room.
5. In spite of my pizza-and-wine fuelled pity party, a sensational and excessive Vietnamese lunch out with J, and a week of no exercise, I have maintained my weight. The downward crawl continues – is 3.5kg in 4 months some kind of record for slowness?
6. I actually like my new haircut
7. It only took about an hour to fix the mistake I made in the cardie I’m knitting for Noddie
8. My Bulldogs RULE!
9. It appears that the people at the church where Noddie has started Sunday school are nice and interesting enough to make up for the minister’s simplistic fundamentalist theology.
10. Tonight J is working late so Noddie and I are going to rug up and go for an Adventure Walk along the creek in the dark!

More anon, moondancers
*Obligatory Running News

Cranky pants

WARNING TO BLOKES: HIGH CHICK STUFF CONTENT!
Unusually, it is NOT your intrepid correspondent LBTEPA who is cranky pants. It is....errr.... how to put this?...my nether regions that are unpleasantly grumbly and PMS-y, and my lower back - while 200000% better than last week, thanks for asking! - is still a bit niggly. So I am a bloated barrel of achy, self-loathing jelly (for clearly, had I been a better person, i.e. more self-disciplined and harder-working, I would have lost more weight and got fitter and none of this would be happening. Please note the absence of the word rational from this description).
And yet, a strangely cheerful BBoA,S-LJ! Life is good. More anon, consumers of yummy crunchy things!

Silver Linings R Us

You are all the biggest DARLINGS who ever drew breath. This is for you. Or this, if you prefer. Up to you.
Now- this pesky sprain. It's mild and should be resolved in a week or so. Unfortunately I don't have a spare ten days - I was already so behind where I wanted to be in my training that it was time to say "enough!" I'm ok about it now. Really. I've even attempted to emulate the heroic Simlin, and given the leftover pizza to the dog. Not that Simlin gave pizza to his dog . But anyway (and aren't strong pain killers the best?) I'm fine. See? I did a list! Lists make everything ok!

BAD THINGS ABOUT DOING THE HALF RATHER THAN THE FULL MARATHON
I really reallly reeeaaalllly wanted to do it! Waaaahhhh!
Nowhere near such good bragging rights.
I feel stupid dragging the family 2000km to do something I could do in Shepparton (BTW no disrespect whatsoever to Shepparton - it's a lovely course)
Explaining why I'm not doing the full will be tiresome.
I'll have to wait until 2009 now as I have Other Plans for later this year.
No excuse to go mental at the expo :(

GOOD THINGS ABOUT DOING THE HALF RATHER THAN THE FULL MARATHON
21.1km is still a pretty long way.
The half-mara starts at 6.30 so I'll have finished before it gets too hot.
The Spousal Unit and Noddie won't have to hang around for hours and hours waiting for me.
I can run with ihatetoast, at least until she gets to full speed. Then I will watch admiringly as she zooms away.
I'll be properly prepared for this and for a full marathon when I do it.
I'll see the full marathon winners finish!
I can cheer on my CR friends doing the marathon.
I will enjoy the rest of the day - and the rest of our lovely holiday - much more if I'm not exhausted and footsore.
I still get bling!
More anon, rainbow-chasers.

50% off

SHOCK ANNOUNCEMENT: In a freak sock-picking-up accident*, LBTEPA has sprained her lumbo-sacral ligament (the doover connecting the spine and pelvis) and on physiotherapist's advice will not be running the Gold Coast Marathon in July. As LBTEPA's physio points out, the trouble with sacral instability is that you can only find out how dodgy it is by testing to destruction, as it were (note: persons whose hobbies do not include endurance sport are unlikely to do this) and then fixing it.
LBTEPA's team is considering what action to take against her unstable pelvis. An intensive strengthening campaign will commence as soon as possible. In the meantime, a programme of anti-inflammatories and ferocious sulking will be undertaken.
LBTEPA was understood to be bitterly disappointed, but in good spirits. Sources close to her have revealed her comment upon hearing of the marathon veto:
"Oh well, you still get bling for the half".
LBTEPA now intends to cry and eat too much pizza.

More anon, silver-lining finders!
*This is completely true.
**I just knew that shirt would come in handy one day.

Memory lane

Red snakeskin dancin' boots + tight jeans +


+
+










+





+









+ my favourite band from my roaring days,Weddings Parties Anything +

=

In like Flynn

*Squeals and does excited girly hand-flap*
There's cash on the barrel now. If it takes me six hours, then it takes me six hours.
*grins, a bit nervously*
As IronGeekGirl says, I may be slow, but I'm stubborn!
Now all I have to do is.....run. Easy*. There aren't even any lions.

More anon, rainbow-chasers!
*Cheerful LBTEPA, who is currently in charge of this blog, is clearly Out Of Her Mind. Oh well

No whingeing today

...so this will be a very short post! I have a rampaging chest infection including quantities of lurid phlegm (now everybody say ewwwwwwwwww)
I can't run, ride or even walk very far because I can't take a deep breath.
I'm going to the doctor this afternoon for the strongest antibiotics he has in his arsenal.
I WILL be better SOON.
I'm not giving up on the marathon yet.

More anon, snifflers!

A nice surprise

This post isn't all about Another Bloody Cold that my revolting germy spouse and offspring have foisted upon my poor hard done-by immune system, nor how angry I am with them for insisting on sharing their toxic emissions, nor how this may well be yet another sign from the universe that I am just not meant to do this marathon because I am so far behind my schedule it's a joke.
No no no no no
it's not.
Really.

Long long ago, in a blog I can't precisely recall, I saw a logo like this. Oooh, I said to myself, how cool! So I g00gled it, as you do, which led me to the gymskinz site. This site is run by the lovely Tav, and contains many t-shirts with See What a Hardcore Triathlete I Am, Loser slogans. There are also some funny ones (ie that appealed to my cranky old bat sense of humour), so I emailed the lovely Tav and tried to order a couple of the technical shirts. And tried. And tried. So much went wrong. Poor Tav. Poor me. It just didn't work. There was too much distance between us (it also had a lot to do with cafepre$$ refusing to recognise a non-US postcode). No amusing shirt, fascinatingly made of crab and prawn shells (true!) for LBTEPA.

The other day I got home from work to find an excitingly squishy parcel. In it was this! And this!Two fabulous, completely unexpected, completely free shirts, all the way from Canada, with a lovely note from the lovely Tav apologising for all the delays, which were not his fault. What a nice man!
I did my long run in one of them the other day and can heartily recommend their moisture-removing qualities and complete absence of chafing. They are beautifully soft and (so far) don't retain bad smells. Thanks Tav!
I'm going to have to get an Athena one now......

Relieved

I’m so glad I didn’t post yesterday and you should be too.
It would have been all OMG my calf is so niggly and sore, how can this be happening? Why oh why did I think I could step straight back into my marathon training? I am such an idiot. It’s not fair, I’ve wanted to do this for months and now it’s all screwed up, I knew I shouldn’t have blogged about it, everyone will think I’m a piker who gets stupid injuries, why did I enter that bike ride? Now I can’t do Melbourne if the Gold Coast doesn’t work out, maybe Hobart in January? But then I’ll be training for (Top Secret too-scary-to-even-mention Summer Plan) oh dear oh dear what if it hurts on tomorrow’s run? I don’t want to go but then if I don’t I can’t run on Saturday I think I’ll just eat something and maybe have a glass of wine oh great now you’ll be fat as well….
Stretch, roll on foam roller, take anti-inflammatories, worry.
Repeat.
Luckily FOR YOU I was boring even myself to tears and couldn’t bring myself to inflict my self-absorption on anyone else.
AND THEN!! halfway through this morning’s Run O’Bleating I realised my calf was feeling fine! Judging from the protests my glutes are sending me, my pesky pelvis probably switched itself off some time ago - it does that. Thanks Noddie! - and has just been made to switch back on again by my physio. Well I say to it, it’s time to get your arse into gear! (hahaha I am so funny)
Two comments on my last post really made me think. Lisa asked, don’t you ever take a break? It’s true, all this triathlon-marathon-bike ride carry-on might seem a bit over the top (not to you of course Wes, GG and SB) - it often does to me! But the thing is, this year I have time. Next year I’ll be back at uni and until 2013 life will be about juggling family and work and study and time and fatigue. This year it doesn’t matter if I’m too tired on a Sunday afternoon to absorb information or produce anything coherent. This year is my opportunity to go after big dreams that I don't really understand why I want so much. I just do. Which brings me to SB’s comment, on my writing that I couldn’t imagine why, or how, I would do these things.
Because they are there to do, and one step at a time.
Amen, brother.
More anon, feathered friends!

the walrus said

The time has come to Announce my Winter Plan.
I'm doing thison July 6th.
And this on October 19th.

At the moment I cannot imagine why. Or how.

Summer's end

RACE REPORT: GATORADE RACE 6
DISTANCE - 750/20/6
TIME 1:44
RATING – RELIEVED
This is a ‘splat’ (unedited) post.
It’s been a pretty long season, for me – four sprint and one Olympic distance triathlon, three ocean races ranging from 2-4km, all in three and a half months, with my thesis, Christmas, summer holidays and a birthday or three mixed in. I never really ‘lifted’ again after the Olympic distance, and then when my old friend the unstable pelvis started wanting attention again – all it had to do was ask, I’d have taken it out for a coffee or something, there was no need to hurt my poor calf for heaven’s sake! – it was all starting to seem too much.
I didn’t mention in previous posts that all I had to do was finish this race to take out the Athena series because I was ashamed that I had every intention of risking injury, and possibly blowing my Winter Project. It was all a tiring tangle in my head. I really want my WP to work out, but because of all the hoo-ha about getting the Athena category started, I think it’s important to fly the flag and show up to races. And I’d already paid. In addition, I’m still a bit angry about how it all unfolded, so if I could take out the series just by showing up then I was bloody going to. I’m a bling-ho and that’s all there is to it.
Anyway: tired, flat, sore and unenthusiastic, off I went. I used The List to pack so I didn’t forget my bike, anti-fog or nutrition. Nor my wetsuit, which was extremely helpful as it was stupidly cold – the clock on the silo on Punt Road read 8 degrees as I drove past. Do you sometimes think about something you are about to do and sigh at your own bloody-mindedness? *sigh*
The thing about having more body-fat than 95% of the people about you is that they all look much colder than you. Oooh it was hard to take off my shoes and socks to put them into my transition setup! My poor toes, brrr! Crisis #1 struck when I noticed I hadn’t replaced my pump after Noddie ‘helped’ me pump up my tyres the previous night. OK, take off the puncture kit. I flat, I walk. But then I noticed my tyres weren’t as high as they should be – dammit! Off we went to the bike shop marquee to use their floor pump. Crisis #2 – Muggins here had wheeled Minerva out without my helmet, and you can’t get into transition without a helmet! Don’t tell SB, but luckily an official who’d seen me go in earlier was good enough to let me past.
Being a shocking sticky-beak I checked the racks to see how many Athenas would be racing. Just three of us had fronted up, since my poor friend M has had anaemia and was resting – or rather, doing the mini-tri, her version of resting. Then it was (shudder) time to get suited up and down to the swim start. It’s never a good sign when the sand is so cold it makes your feet burn. The water wasn’t as cold as I expected, huzzah! - until I put my face in it – cryogenics, anyone? There was much chatting and gosh-aren’t-we-stupid/brave? among the lunatics who sat shivering in the water cos it was warmer than standing in the wind. Kathy the fast Athena (in the photo in the last post) was there; the poor darl has had a hip injury and wasn’t sure if she could finish the run. She told me after the race that she felt very strongly about the Athena category because she’d had lap-band surgery and knew exactly how hard it was for large women to get into exercise. Fingers crossed her hip recovers completely.
My swim was a disgrace. The tide was pretty far out so there was lots of wading/dolphining involved; it hurt to put my face in the water; I was consumed by a feeling of not-giving-a-rat’s-arse. Then I had to carve through the field, which was tiresome; eventually it occurred to me I wasn’t going to be at all happy with my time and should pull my finger out quicksticks. Wade wade run run puff puff get-this-bastard-wetsuit-OFF! sunnies-helmet-shoes and away we go!
The sun had come up but there was a stiff breeze and my stupid legs stupidly hurt so sooky la-la LBTEPA-evasion tactics had to be applied from the word go. We had three goes into the wind becuase the course was two long thin loops, first heading north from transition, then south back past it and then back again (if you follow me). I concentrated on not complaining, not caring if my legs hurt, and looking forward to the two long tailwind sections. And not thinking about the run! The run is for the run, all you have to do is ride, the run is for the run….. I kept seeing the technical officials and worrying they were going to ping me for something I had no idea about. I do try really hard to move over or drop back when someone passes, but so many people pass me! Pedal pedal pedal…ahhhhh lovely tailwind…thankyou marshall! drink some water eat a gel pedal pedal pedal stop whining just keep your legs going all you have to do is finish now you can walk it in if you flat pedal pedal pedal
T2 was slightly less shite than usual even though I put my socks on. I don't know why, but if I put them on in T1 they always end up wet. I knew I’d want something warm on my feet and I was right. Kathy’s bike wasn’t there (I didn’t know about her flat) so I was a bit concerned and hoped she’d be able to finish. The third woman never showed up at all, which was clever of her.
It wasn’t too cold and we were mostly sheltered from the wind - it was just that my legs had turned to concrete! Ah ha! thought I, you can’t fool me into giving up, I’ve been here before. Just keep going. Keep going. Gosh I’m slow. Why do I bother doing this when I’m so bad at it? STOP that! Head up. Lift your knees. Sing your endless silly song from Playschool that reminds you of Noddie and makes you laugh. Thank the marshals. Drink at the drink stops. Walk the ‘0’ minutes. You know what? This isn’t so bad!
To my relief, my calf was just feeling heavy and tired, not too sore. On and on I trundled. I could see the finish in the distance – it was time to gun it and run hard! Alas, my calf was having none of that - the muscle pulled so hard and painfully I almost stopped dead. Bastard! Don’t you do this to me now! Oh come on, just another 500 metres, that’s all…please? Well f#$% you mate, I’m running anyway and hoppity-skipped, limped and finally trundled my way to the finish.
The first aid tent bloke was lovely and taped some ice on my leg so I could walk around dripping and looking totally hardcore LOL.
I was very glad to see Kathy at the presentations – even with the flat tyre she was only two minutes behind me! We got talking about how intimidating the whole hard-bodied Orbea-riding tri scene could be; it was then she told me about her surgery and all the changes she’d made to her life. I was disgusted to hear that she had not got one single medal for any of her races even though she’d placed every time – not only had she never been on the podium, they’d never even posted her bling to her!! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! It was time for a quick lesson in ‘Pushy’, so I went up to the medal table and made sure the Athenas would be part of the presentations – and even then they gave Kathy third place instead of second! WTF? I also introduced her to the RD, a charming and capable person who I’m sure will sort it out. We did get a nice if slightly bewildered round of applause from the crowd (who are these fat slow chicks and why are they giving them stuff? Or is that my paranoia talking?). As series winner – I can’t get over how funny that is! – I got a bike chain cleaning kit and a $50 voucher to a bike shop, woot! I have sent a donation to the Butterfly Foundation.
I was so happy to get back into the warm car, and to find a parking place near where my friends were meeting up after the Run for the Kids, and to catch up, and have a beer, and to go home.

There is no sensible title for this post

Firstly - did you go to Bold's blog and get a link to the write2fight page?
It's not a pretty sight here at chez LBTEPA. We all have the lurgi to varying degrees, which means that Noddie (getting over it) is being allowed to behave like an absolute feral by the Spousal Unit (just getting it) who then does his nut because she is rampaging around while he wants to lie pathetically on the couch and watch endless annoying crap TV, while I (bravely struggling through, ahem) am grinding my back molars flat calming everything down after returning from the physio - who hurt me whilst thwarting the Return of the Unstable Pelvis (thanks Noddie! NOT!) and has introduced me to the happy world of foam rollers - and the supermarket.
However
since I took first place in Gatorade Race 6 (Athena category), owing to Kathy the fast chick having a flat tyre and it being so cold no-one else was stupid enough to show up
and hence
became the 2007 - 08 Gatorade Series Winner (Athena category) - it just shows that turning up is 90% of the battle, no? - I couldn't care less. Pass the echinacea and the bubbly! And don't ask me to take off the bling.

More anon, pothunters!

'cause it's not always all about me

Go to Bold's blog.
Then go to the site he has founded in memory of his late wife.
Then get one of these and put it in your blog. Using the energy of blogs to help fight cancer is A Very Good Thing, so just go and do it this very minute. Spit spot!

After you've done that, pop over and wish Jeanne good luck in her half-marathon on Saturday, and Kathryn all the best in the Run for the Kids on Sunday. Go on, off you go!

Geez I'm bossy. But it's better than whingeing about how my back is still sore and my calf is still niggly and now Noddie has given me her stupid bug so I feel crappy and I am going to race on Sunday if it kills me, don't you think?

More anon, starfish-flingers!

not the best fun ever

I’m still feeling a bit sore and sorry for myself today. Gosh it was beautiful down near the river near Mum’s place when I went out for my long run last Saturday morning, golden paddocks, shimmering wetlands, a nice breeze through the poplars…everything was superb apart from the fact that I couldn’t get my stupid calf to loosen up.... cue sinister music..... All of a sudden, just as I was about to turn for home..... BLAM! It was as though something had sunk its teeth into me, or stuck its talons into my calf and twisted and refused to let go. Ow ow ow oooooooooooooooh but it was painful, and try as I might I couldn’t get it to release. After a bit of creative cursing - not too much, as I was more shocked than furious - everything had been going along so nicely! - I took stock. It was still warm and sunny with a nice breeze, the paddocks were still golden etc, I had plenty of water and a couple of gels……it was just the 8k of deserted road, no phone and a gait restricted to a hobble that I had to deal with.

Hmmm, I thought…what would Wes do? So I thought myself some positive and uplifting thoughts and got started back. What would Kathryn and Katy do? I didn’t have anything fabulous to change into and couldn’t think of any pithy ways to sum up my predicament, but I did try and see the funny side, such as it was. What would Morsey do? Although it was hard with neither a dog nor a sense of humour (I think I dropped that in the grass beside the road), I kept on moving, trying to run – cos it was going to take a f#$% of a long time if I walked all the way! – and counted those minutes until it was time to walk. Mary Sunshine and SB lent me some of their unimaginably vast reservoirs of endurance and good temper.... just keep going, that’s what it’s all about……and Iron Wil and Iron Misty told me, hey, hurting and being scared and doubtful you can make it is just part of the fun, as long as you don’t let it stop you! Yes, they are kind of weird, but in a good way. Mostly, though, I tried to be like Jeanne. There’s no better friend when you’re moaning and bitching your way home to the icepack and drugs!Just opposite the bluff is where I turned around
Time went on, and so did the road, and the music in my headphones, and the horrid painful gripping in the back of my leg, and then I could see the last corner and the last hill and I was back and it was time to suck down ibuprofen and be Mummy and go to the races and out sailing and suck down more ibuprofen and ice myself with frozen beans because we had eaten all the peas the day before.
It’s been getting slowly better but I went to the physio yesterday because my back was hurting as well, and I DO NOT HAVE A BAD BACK. It turns out it’s all that pesky sacroiliac region faffing about, not doing its job and amusing itself referring pain out around its friends the hamstrings, hips and lower back. A bit of excruciating thumb-digging by the physio and some mildly pornographic stretches to do for a few days and I’ll apparently be good as gold. Just as well, since the last tri of the season is on Sunday and I am already working on Winter Project #1 (official announcement shortly).
More anon, hobblers!

Beans

My left calf is quite painful since the Long Run Of Doom a couple of days ago and I have discovered why people recommend using a bag of frozen peas to ice sore areas. Frozen beans are pointy.

Happy Easter

Easter Blessings to you!We're at Mum's for the long weekend. Take care, and enjoy those HCBs!

Or easter eggs, if you prefer (weirdo)More anon, oologists.

79 = 81

I am aware that this post makes me appear a complete half-back flanker, but there you go.....
So there I was, standing at the counter in the photo shop when my phone rang. It was the lovely and endlessly patient department secretary with my long-anticipated thesis mark. Congratulations! Your thesis mark was 79, which gives you an overall mark for fourth year of 81. Well done!
I was speechless. 79? Seventy-nine? You f#$% me around all year with supervisors buggering off and other supervisors giving away our subjects to their masters students so I had no hope of significant results and you take four months to sort out my ethics application so I have three months instead of seven to get twelve thousand half-decent words down, and you take three months to mark it, and you can't even choke out one more mark so I can have an HD? Spitting chips doesn't even begin to describe my reaction. Ropeable, livid? Pretty much spot on. Then I got all moany and poor me and it's not fair about how well I could have done had I had the aforementioned seven months. I didn't know what to think so I wandered about the shopping centre for a while, scowling horribly, and bought J a present. Luckily it's hot cross bun season - I only eat them in the two weeks before Easter otherwise I would be like the side of a house, I love them so - so some warm buttery goodness, and a couple of kind phone calls from my lovely lovely friends were just what it took to help me calm the heck down and cheer the heck up. HUGE mwah mwah mwah and hugs to M and A, you girls are the BEST! This isn't pretty, but I have to confess it didn't take me long to move from self-pity to self-congratulation - the official position on my fourth year thesis is now something along the lines of no subjects? No supervisor? Three months instead of seven? That the best you can do? Bring It On, baby - and I'll still get 79, so there! *blows raspberry*
So now what? The Spousal Unit - who has just been promoted at work - CONGRATULATIONS YOU BIG SPUNK!!! - and I have celebrated with Indian takeaway and bubbles. Ooooh I know- last of the high-steppers, that's us! I'll apply for entry into Masters in Clinical Psychology in October and find out in November where I'm going next year. I hope 81 is enough to get back into LaTrobe (plan A - just down the road, and with a very highly-regarded CBT-based program), cause it's all I've got. It'll certainly get me into RMIT (plan B, a little bit further down the road and also CBT-based but mostly child psych, eww).
So that's that. Now it's time to get off my lardy behind and out on my bike before I pick Noddie up from kinder. You have a lovely day :)
More anon, toilers!

Why Dreaming Big is Good For You

*Yawns*
Stretches, tries to remember what being a hard-arse early-rising tri-machine (ROFL) was like. Fails.
You know, it could easily have turned out quite differently. My highest duties are as wife and mother, and I am paid to go to work. I could have set my sights on the Olympic tri, and worked hard, and something could have come up that made it 'not the right time'. I would have had to suck it up, and think about the Next Plan.
But nothing came up. It was the right time. I did face the fears and do the work and it all worked out superbly on the day.
Now I feel taller. I smile all the time and walk with a certain inner strut. I own a Wonder Woman t-shirt and now I wear it. I've started working on my next Next Plan (of which more anon) and I already know I can do it if I keep working. This will almost certainly change - I don't think one success eradicates the bleat gene! - but just at the moment I can do anything, with awesome shoes and perfect lipstick.
That, my dear friends, is why you should Dream Big. You can't always pull it off, but when you do, it's the Best Feeling Evah!

Moving to non-messianic mode, we've had a lovely weekend. J and I went to a wedding on Saturday and Noddie had a sleepover at Nanny and Pa's place = Mummy and Daddy sleep in until 8.30! Last night we piled along to the park for an Easter picnic orgnaised by J's work. Great fun. I am SUPPOSED to hear my thesis mark from uni today but am not holding my breath. Hmph.

More anon, my treasures :)

LATE UPDATE: I have received my thesis mark and therefore my final Honours mark. I am in the peculiar position of feeing simultaneously extremely pleased and absolutely ropeable.