Tuesday, April 29, 2008

ORN*: 15m

That’s minutes. Oh well. Little by little. Thursday I’ll do 30 min and then on Saturday the prescription is an hour.
Following the lead of the mighty GGtI in not being All Complaining All the Time (not that there’s anything wrong with that), here’s my list of 10 things that made this week a good one.
1. Noddie is totally the best in her swimming class – after 3 weeks, vindicating my decision to delay sending her until she was old enough to have appropriate motor co-ordination and social skills. Proud Mummy/bang my head moment: we go to the pool nearly every week, and nearly every week Noddie wants to float on her back - with her chin tucked right down on her chest. So nearly every week I suggest she might like to point her chin up at the ceiling – and nearly every week she bellows “NO!” in her implacably contrary way. In swimming class she is the only one who points her chin at the ceiling.
2. Damn but I like riding my bike! Last night I went out – coz my back is much better and the physio said I could! - and it was wild and woolly, and windy, and the rain spattering on my jacket made a cool sound, and my yellow glasses made everything look spectacularly eerie - and when I got home the heater was on and Noddie was teaching the Spousal Unit how to play the triangle.
3. I have quite a bit to do at work. This is good. Trust me, there are few things more soul-sapping than feeling pointless.
4. We are all completely in love with the dinosaur fairy lights that J brought home for Noddie’s room.
5. In spite of my pizza-and-wine fuelled pity party, a sensational and excessive Vietnamese lunch out with J, and a week of no exercise, I have maintained my weight. The downward crawl continues – is 3.5kg in 4 months some kind of record for slowness?
6. I actually like my new haircut
7. It only took about an hour to fix the mistake I made in the cardie I’m knitting for Noddie
8. My Bulldogs RULE!
9. It appears that the people at the church where Noddie has started Sunday school are nice and interesting enough to make up for the minister’s simplistic fundamentalist theology.
10. Tonight J is working late so Noddie and I are going to rug up and go for an Adventure Walk along the creek in the dark!

More anon, moondancers
*Obligatory Running News

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Cranky pants

Unusually, it is NOT your intrepid correspondent LBTEPA who is cranky pants. It is....errr.... how to put this? nether regions that are unpleasantly grumbly and PMS-y, and my lower back - while 200000% better than last week, thanks for asking! - is still a bit niggly. So I am a bloated barrel of achy, self-loathing jelly (for clearly, had I been a better person, i.e. more self-disciplined and harder-working, I would have lost more weight and got fitter and none of this would be happening. Please note the absence of the word rational from this description).
And yet, a strangely cheerful BBoA,S-LJ! Life is good. More anon, consumers of yummy crunchy things!

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Silver Linings R Us

You are all the biggest DARLINGS who ever drew breath. This is for you. Or this, if you prefer. Up to you.
Now- this pesky sprain. It's mild and should be resolved in a week or so. Unfortunately I don't have a spare ten days - I was already so behind where I wanted to be in my training that it was time to say "enough!" I'm ok about it now. Really. I've even attempted to emulate the heroic Simlin, and given the leftover pizza to the dog. Not that Simlin gave pizza to his dog . But anyway (and aren't strong pain killers the best?) I'm fine. See? I did a list! Lists make everything ok!

I really reallly reeeaaalllly wanted to do it! Waaaahhhh!
Nowhere near such good bragging rights.
I feel stupid dragging the family 2000km to do something I could do in Shepparton (BTW no disrespect whatsoever to Shepparton - it's a lovely course)
Explaining why I'm not doing the full will be tiresome.
I'll have to wait until 2009 now as I have Other Plans for later this year.
No excuse to go mental at the expo :(

21.1km is still a pretty long way.
The half-mara starts at 6.30 so I'll have finished before it gets too hot.
The Spousal Unit and Noddie won't have to hang around for hours and hours waiting for me.
I can run with ihatetoast, at least until she gets to full speed. Then I will watch admiringly as she zooms away.
I'll be properly prepared for this and for a full marathon when I do it.
I'll see the full marathon winners finish!
I can cheer on my CR friends doing the marathon.
I will enjoy the rest of the day - and the rest of our lovely holiday - much more if I'm not exhausted and footsore.
I still get bling!
More anon, rainbow-chasers.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

50% off

SHOCK ANNOUNCEMENT: In a freak sock-picking-up accident*, LBTEPA has sprained her lumbo-sacral ligament (the doover connecting the spine and pelvis) and on physiotherapist's advice will not be running the Gold Coast Marathon in July. As LBTEPA's physio points out, the trouble with sacral instability is that you can only find out how dodgy it is by testing to destruction, as it were (note: persons whose hobbies do not include endurance sport are unlikely to do this) and then fixing it.
LBTEPA's team is considering what action to take against her unstable pelvis. An intensive strengthening campaign will commence as soon as possible. In the meantime, a programme of anti-inflammatories and ferocious sulking will be undertaken.
LBTEPA was understood to be bitterly disappointed, but in good spirits. Sources close to her have revealed her comment upon hearing of the marathon veto:
"Oh well, you still get bling for the half".
LBTEPA now intends to cry and eat too much pizza.

More anon, silver-lining finders!
*This is completely true.
**I just knew that shirt would come in handy one day.

Friday, April 18, 2008

Memory lane

Red snakeskin dancin' boots + tight jeans +




+ my favourite band from my roaring days,Weddings Parties Anything +


Wednesday, April 16, 2008

In like Flynn

*Squeals and does excited girly hand-flap*
There's cash on the barrel now. If it takes me six hours, then it takes me six hours.
*grins, a bit nervously*
As IronGeekGirl says, I may be slow, but I'm stubborn!
Now all I have to do Easy*. There aren't even any lions.

More anon, rainbow-chasers!
*Cheerful LBTEPA, who is currently in charge of this blog, is clearly Out Of Her Mind. Oh well

Monday, April 14, 2008

No whingeing today this will be a very short post! I have a rampaging chest infection including quantities of lurid phlegm (now everybody say ewwwwwwwwww)
I can't run, ride or even walk very far because I can't take a deep breath.
I'm going to the doctor this afternoon for the strongest antibiotics he has in his arsenal.
I WILL be better SOON.
I'm not giving up on the marathon yet.

More anon, snifflers!

Friday, April 11, 2008

A nice surprise

This post isn't all about Another Bloody Cold that my revolting germy spouse and offspring have foisted upon my poor hard done-by immune system, nor how angry I am with them for insisting on sharing their toxic emissions, nor how this may well be yet another sign from the universe that I am just not meant to do this marathon because I am so far behind my schedule it's a joke.
No no no no no
it's not.

Long long ago, in a blog I can't precisely recall, I saw a logo like this. Oooh, I said to myself, how cool! So I g00gled it, as you do, which led me to the gymskinz site. This site is run by the lovely Tav, and contains many t-shirts with See What a Hardcore Triathlete I Am, Loser slogans. There are also some funny ones (ie that appealed to my cranky old bat sense of humour), so I emailed the lovely Tav and tried to order a couple of the technical shirts. And tried. And tried. So much went wrong. Poor Tav. Poor me. It just didn't work. There was too much distance between us (it also had a lot to do with cafepre$$ refusing to recognise a non-US postcode). No amusing shirt, fascinatingly made of crab and prawn shells (true!) for LBTEPA.

The other day I got home from work to find an excitingly squishy parcel.
In it was this! And this!Two fabulous, completely unexpected, completely free shirts, all the way from Canada, with a lovely note from the lovely Tav apologising for all the delays, which were not his fault. What a nice man!
I did my long run in one of them the other day and can heartily recommend their moisture-removing qualities and complete absence of chafing. They are beautifully soft and (so far) don't retain bad smells. Thanks Tav!
I'm going to have to get an Athena one now......

Thursday, April 10, 2008


I’m so glad I didn’t post yesterday and you should be too.
It would have been all OMG my calf is so niggly and sore, how can this be happening? Why oh why did I think I could step straight back into my marathon training? I am such an idiot. It’s not fair, I’ve wanted to do this for months and now it’s all screwed up, I knew I shouldn’t have blogged about it, everyone will think I’m a piker who gets stupid injuries, why did I enter that bike ride? Now I can’t do Melbourne if the Gold Coast doesn’t work out, maybe Hobart in January? But then I’ll be training for (Top Secret too-scary-to-even-mention Summer Plan) oh dear oh dear what if it hurts on tomorrow’s run? I don’t want to go but then if I don’t I can’t run on Saturday I think I’ll just eat something and maybe have a glass of wine oh great now you’ll be fat as well….
Stretch, roll on foam roller, take anti-inflammatories, worry.
Luckily FOR YOU I was boring even myself to tears and couldn’t bring myself to inflict my self-absorption on anyone else.
AND THEN!! halfway through this morning’s Run O’Bleating I realised my calf was feeling fine! Judging from the protests my glutes are sending me, my pesky pelvis probably switched itself off some time ago - it does that. Thanks Noddie! - and has just been made to switch back on again by my physio. Well I say to it, it’s time to get your arse into gear! (hahaha I am so funny)
Two comments on my last post really made me think. Lisa asked, don’t you ever take a break? It’s true, all this triathlon-marathon-bike ride carry-on might seem a bit over the top (not to you of course Wes, GG and SB) - it often does to me! But the thing is, this year I have time. Next year I’ll be back at uni and until 2013 life will be about juggling family and work and study and time and fatigue. This year it doesn’t matter if I’m too tired on a Sunday afternoon to absorb information or produce anything coherent. This year is my opportunity to go after big dreams that I don't really understand why I want so much. I just do. Which brings me to SB’s comment, on my writing that I couldn’t imagine why, or how, I would do these things.
Because they are there to do, and one step at a time.
Amen, brother.
More anon, feathered friends!

Sunday, April 06, 2008

the walrus said

The time has come to Announce my Winter Plan.
I'm doing thison July 6th.
And this on October 19th.

At the moment I cannot imagine why. Or how.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Summer's end

DISTANCE - 750/20/6
TIME 1:44
This is a ‘splat’ (unedited) post.
It’s been a pretty long season, for me – four sprint and one Olympic distance triathlon, three ocean races ranging from 2-4km, all in three and a half months, with my thesis, Christmas, summer holidays and a birthday or three mixed in. I never really ‘lifted’ again after the Olympic distance, and then when my old friend the unstable pelvis started wanting attention again – all it had to do was ask, I’d have taken it out for a coffee or something, there was no need to hurt my poor calf for heaven’s sake! – it was all starting to seem too much.
I didn’t mention in previous posts that all I had to do was finish this race to take out the Athena series because I was ashamed that I had every intention of risking injury, and possibly blowing my Winter Project. It was all a tiring tangle in my head. I really want my WP to work out, but because of all the hoo-ha about getting the Athena category started, I think it’s important to fly the flag and show up to races. And I’d already paid. In addition, I’m still a bit angry about how it all unfolded, so if I could take out the series just by showing up then I was bloody going to. I’m a bling-ho and that’s all there is to it.
Anyway: tired, flat, sore and unenthusiastic, off I went. I used The List to pack so I didn’t forget my bike, anti-fog or nutrition. Nor my wetsuit, which was extremely helpful as it was stupidly cold – the clock on the silo on Punt Road read 8 degrees as I drove past. Do you sometimes think about something you are about to do and sigh at your own bloody-mindedness? *sigh*
The thing about having more body-fat than 95% of the people about you is that they all look much colder than you. Oooh it was hard to take off my shoes and socks to put them into my transition setup! My poor toes, brrr! Crisis #1 struck when I noticed I hadn’t replaced my pump after Noddie ‘helped’ me pump up my tyres the previous night. OK, take off the puncture kit. I flat, I walk. But then I noticed my tyres weren’t as high as they should be – dammit! Off we went to the bike shop marquee to use their floor pump. Crisis #2 – Muggins here had wheeled Minerva out without my helmet, and you can’t get into transition without a helmet! Don’t tell SB, but luckily an official who’d seen me go in earlier was good enough to let me past.
Being a shocking sticky-beak I checked the racks to see how many Athenas would be racing. Just three of us had fronted up, since my poor friend M has had anaemia and was resting – or rather, doing the mini-tri, her version of resting. Then it was (shudder) time to get suited up and down to the swim start. It’s never a good sign when the sand is so cold it makes your feet burn. The water wasn’t as cold as I expected, huzzah! - until I put my face in it – cryogenics, anyone? There was much chatting and gosh-aren’t-we-stupid/brave? among the lunatics who sat shivering in the water cos it was warmer than standing in the wind. Kathy the fast Athena (in the photo in the last post) was there; the poor darl has had a hip injury and wasn’t sure if she could finish the run. She told me after the race that she felt very strongly about the Athena category because she’d had lap-band surgery and knew exactly how hard it was for large women to get into exercise. Fingers crossed her hip recovers completely.
My swim was a disgrace. The tide was pretty far out so there was lots of wading/dolphining involved; it hurt to put my face in the water; I was consumed by a feeling of not-giving-a-rat’s-arse. Then I had to carve through the field, which was tiresome; eventually it occurred to me I wasn’t going to be at all happy with my time and should pull my finger out quicksticks. Wade wade run run puff puff get-this-bastard-wetsuit-OFF! sunnies-helmet-shoes and away we go!
The sun had come up but there was a stiff breeze and my stupid legs stupidly hurt so sooky la-la LBTEPA-evasion tactics had to be applied from the word go. We had three goes into the wind becuase the course was two long thin loops, first heading north from transition, then south back past it and then back again (if you follow me). I concentrated on not complaining, not caring if my legs hurt, and looking forward to the two long tailwind sections. And not thinking about the run! The run is for the run, all you have to do is ride, the run is for the run….. I kept seeing the technical officials and worrying they were going to ping me for something I had no idea about. I do try really hard to move over or drop back when someone passes, but so many people pass me! Pedal pedal pedal…ahhhhh lovely tailwind…thankyou marshall! drink some water eat a gel pedal pedal pedal stop whining just keep your legs going all you have to do is finish now you can walk it in if you flat pedal pedal pedal
T2 was slightly less shite than usual even though I put my socks on. I don't know why, but if I put them on in T1 they always end up wet. I knew I’d want something warm on my feet and I was right. Kathy’s bike wasn’t there (I didn’t know about her flat) so I was a bit concerned and hoped she’d be able to finish. The third woman never showed up at all, which was clever of her.
It wasn’t too cold and we were mostly sheltered from the wind - it was just that my legs had turned to concrete! Ah ha! thought I, you can’t fool me into giving up, I’ve been here before. Just keep going. Keep going. Gosh I’m slow. Why do I bother doing this when I’m so bad at it? STOP that! Head up. Lift your knees. Sing your endless silly song from Playschool that reminds you of Noddie and makes you laugh. Thank the marshals. Drink at the drink stops. Walk the ‘0’ minutes. You know what? This isn’t so bad!
To my relief, my calf was just feeling heavy and tired, not too sore. On and on I trundled. I could see the finish in the distance – it was time to gun it and run hard! Alas, my calf was having none of that - the muscle pulled so hard and painfully I almost stopped dead. Bastard! Don’t you do this to me now! Oh come on, just another 500 metres, that’s all…please? Well f#$% you mate, I’m running anyway and hoppity-skipped, limped and finally trundled my way to the finish.
The first aid tent bloke was lovely and taped some ice on my leg so I could walk around dripping and looking totally hardcore LOL.
I was very glad to see Kathy at the presentations – even with the flat tyre she was only two minutes behind me! We got talking about how intimidating the whole hard-bodied Orbea-riding tri scene could be; it was then she told me about her surgery and all the changes she’d made to her life. I was disgusted to hear that she had not got one single medal for any of her races even though she’d placed every time – not only had she never been on the podium, they’d never even posted her bling to her!! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! It was time for a quick lesson in ‘Pushy’, so I went up to the medal table and made sure the Athenas would be part of the presentations – and even then they gave Kathy third place instead of second! WTF? I also introduced her to the RD, a charming and capable person who I’m sure will sort it out. We did get a nice if slightly bewildered round of applause from the crowd (who are these fat slow chicks and why are they giving them stuff? Or is that my paranoia talking?). As series winner – I can’t get over how funny that is! – I got a bike chain cleaning kit and a $50 voucher to a bike shop, woot! I have sent a donation to the Butterfly Foundation.
I was so happy to get back into the warm car, and to find a parking place near where my friends were meeting up after the Run for the Kids, and to catch up, and have a beer, and to go home.